Of Bowie, big cats, Cool Britannia, Baranski, Benidorm, Osmond brother, bonking blockade, Beethoven, Bond and the Black Dyke Band

Immerse yourself...

Another snippets post today, dear reader:

• God news: Everything these days seems to be "an immersive experience" - dinosaurs, the Titanic, numerous Egyptian kings and queens, the Vikings - and now it's David Bowie's turn! You’re Not Alone [pictured above] features an hour-long 360-degree film directed by Mark Grimmer – lead designer for the V&A’s blockbusting 2013 exhibition David Bowie Is – and is showing at London’s “immersive exhibition space” Lightroom. The blurb on its website reads: "Featuring the artist as its sole voice, a story composed from hundreds of interviews spanning a five-decade-long career at the cutting edge of art and culture sees Bowie invite you into his way of thinking like never before." We'll be the judge of that!
• "Here, kitty, kitty" news: The audience at a circus in Rostov, Russia got more than they bargained for when a ginormous Bengal tiger took advantage as a barrier collapsed, leapt out into the auditorium and bolted for the door. Without eating any children. More's the pity.

[Photo: the fabulous IanVisits blog; click any pic to embiggen]

• "Cool Britannia" news: A new free exhibition 1996: A celebration of the wildest year of Britain’s wildest decade - 30 years on promises to bring to life the spirit of the year when Britpop, Girl Power and superstar DJ club nights were at their imperial height, with outfits worn by The Spice Girls [including Geri's Union Jack boots, above], previously unseen Oasis memorabilia, personal items owned by legendary record producers and DJs Paul Oakenfold, Dave Pearce and Judge Jules, and the art, fashion, sport, and politics of that so-called "Cool Britannia" era. It runs from 16 April to 19 September 2026 at the City of London Corporation’s Barbican Music Library. "But don't look back in anger, I heard you say..."
• Gay icon(s) news: The fantabulosa Christine Baranski (and the equally faboo Richard E Grant) are set to star in a revival of Noel Coward's Hay Fever at Wyndham’s Theatre (from 22nd September)! Miss Baranski's debut on the West End stage, apparently [although we did see her at the Royal Albert Hall in Follies back in 2015, but that doesn't count]...

• RIP, Elsie Kelly aka "Noreen" in Benidorm...

• ...and Alan Osmond, eldest of the singing brothers.
• Safe sex shortage news: Thanks to the blockade of the Strait of Hormuz, and a shortage of raw materials, the price of condoms is set to rocket by 30%!
• Culture with a capital "K" news: This year's BBC Proms season programme has been announced - with 86 Proms across eight weeks, 20 international ensembles, 41 orchestras and choirs from across the UK, 42 Proms appearances from the BBC’s own orchestras and choirs, 20 premieres including 17 BBC commissions and co-commissions, and 14 Proms across the UK including residencies at Bristol Beacon and the Glasshouse International Centre for Music (Gateshead), and the first ever Prom in Mold, North Wales; and highlights including the Proms debuts of The Met Orchestra, the Spanish National Orchestra and the Mahler Academy Orchestra, a Prog Rock Prom, an evening with Evelyn Glennie, a celebration of soul legend Marvin Gaye, a brass band Prom with the Black Dyke Band, and a Prom featuring iconic music from the James Bond films titled "Bond and Beyond". Phew!

• And finally: Happy St George's Day to our English chums!

Pull that string! [click to embiggen]

And the weather? Beautiful and sunny, but still a chilly wind.

The Nonce Cinematic Universe

The new Michael Jackson film is the first instalment of an interconnected cinematic universe of celebrity sex offenders, its producers have announced.

As well as telling the King of Pop’s origin story, Michael launches a multi-movie franchise about rich and famous celebrity wrong ‘uns which is projected to come together for a thrilling crossover finale in 2031.

Film insider Tom Booker said: “Don’t worry if you’re not familiar with all the dusty old source material on these guys. The NCU will tell you everything you need to know.

“Michael eases you in with a straightforward tale about a poor black kid who grows up to be the world’s most famous sex monster. Sit through the end credits and there’s a teaser for the next film in the series, 'Andrew: Prince of Paedos'.

“That leads into the Woody Allen biopic, then we go back a couple of decades and see the roots of it all with Jimmy Savile, Stuart Hall and Rolf Harris in 'It Was A Different Time: The 70s Story'.

“Yes, we’ve had to be creative in scriptwriting to tie it all together, but give Michael a magic rhinestone-studded glove and I think audiences will be in their seats cheering as the paedos put their differences aside to battle a galactic threat only they can defeat.”

Cinemagoer Martin Bishop said: “I can’t wait for them to keep churning these movies out long after they’ve stopped being good.”

The Daily Mash

Of course.

[The "real" story]

HM The Rainbow Queen

..in red.

...in orange.

...in yellow.

...in green.

...in blue.

...in indigo.

...in violet...

...and in pink!

One hundred years ago today, our beloved - and still sadly missed - HM The Queen Elizabeth, the longest-reigning monarch the United Kingdom ever had [and second-longest-reigning in history, after France's Louis XIV], was born.

Generations of people knew no other monarch except her. She saw 15 British prime ministers and 14 US presidents come and go during her reign, as well as numerous global conflicts from Korea to the Gulf, the Cold War from Stalin's death through to the fall of the Berlin Wall, the transition of Empire to Commonwealth (on occasions bloodily, sometimes peacefully), the rise and fall of apartheid in South Africa, myriad political scandals from Profumo to "Partygate", tragedies from the Aberfan disaster to IRA bombing campaigns to the Dunblane massacre to the Grenfell Tower inferno, the decline of major British industries, the invention of the internet and the rise of the information age, a palace intruder, Royal weddings and divorces and the "annus horribilis", the death of Diana [as well as her mum The Queen Mother, her sister Margaret, and her husband Prince Philip], pretending to parachute into the Olympic Stadium with James Bond, the COVID pandemic and "tea with Paddington". She gave Royal Assent to 2,820 public bills and 235 private bills into law, presided over 70 State Openings of Parliament and almost the same number of Christmas broadcasts - and heaven only knows how many other speeches or dedications she must have made during her extensive visits to just about every country on the planet!

When she died four years ago, millions watched coverage of her funeral, and thousands upon thousands of people paid tribute in person, queuing - myself included, for eleven hours - to pay respects at her lying in-state.

Cheers, Ma'am. Nothing's quite the same without you.

Here's another tribute (of sorts):

Hinge & Bracket - A Regular Royal Queen

Then one of us will be a Queen,
And sit on a golden throne,
With a crown instead
Of a hat on her head,
And diamonds all her own!
With a beautiful robe of gold and green,
I've always understood;
I wonder whether
She'd wear a feather?
I rather think she should!

Oh, 'tis a glorious thing, I ween,
To be a regular Royal Queen!
No half-and-half affair, I mean,
No half-and-half affair,
But a right-down regular,
Regular, regular,
Regular Royal Queen!

She'll drive about in a carriage and pair,
With the King on her left-hand side,
And a milk-white horse,
As a matter of course,
Whenever she wants to ride!
With beautiful silver shoes to wear
Upon her dainty feet;
With endless stocks
Of beautiful frocks
And as much as she wants to eat!

Oh, 'tis a glorious thing, I ween,
To be a regular Royal Queen!
No half-and-half affair, I mean,
No half-and-half affair,
But a right-down regular,
Regular, regular,
Regular Royal Queen!

HM The Queen Elizabeth II (21st April 1926 - 8th September 2022)

Beat me on the bottom with a Woman's Weekly

"Everyone's a national treasure these days; you can't move for them. But there should only ever be one at a time. For years, it was Dame Thora Hird. After she died, it was going to be Judi Dench, but then Joanna Lumley saved the Gurkhas so she got the gig."

It's certainly the year of sad anniversaries. On this day a decade ago, we lost the genius that was Victoria Wood. And, yes, she was a "national treasure"!

Needless to say, I, Madam Arcati, and all "our gang" absolutely idolised the woman. As did the majority of British society. We can all recite lines - maybe even whole sketches word-for-word - from her ground-breaking television series. And here's just a tiny sample of our favourites...

Victoria Wood and Julie Walters - Turkish Bath

Victoria Wood - Two Soups

Victoria Wood - Shoe Shop

Victoria Wood - The Cafe queue

Victoria Wood - Acorn Antiques

Of course, I haven't forgotten it's a Tacky Music Monday - so here's the ultimate pick-me-up with which to start the week!

Victoria Wood - Ballad of Barry and Freda

Victoria Wood (19th May 1953 – 20th April 2016). We still miss you.

Have a good week, dear reader.

Come on, meet me on the dancefloor

Another sunny day, another day in the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers, trying to drown out the demon children next door and their sodding karaoke machine with blasts of Sounds of the Seventies while pottering and making things lovely...

Meanwhile, Queen Madge continues her latest comeback - she appeared on stage with Sabrina Carpenter at Coachella Festival last night, and the full-length version of I Feel So Free has been released!

I love it!

Madonna - I Feel So Free

Thoughts?

Nothing compares

One of our new acquisitions, Salvia Salgoon Lake George, looking gorgeous in the sunshine [click to embiggen]

It has been another beautiful Spring day and, needless to say, I spent most of it in the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers: I built another set of display shelves [as you can see in the background of the photo above], potted-on another load of small plants into bigger pots, created the first of what will be a number of window box/wall-pot displays, and did load of general pottering besides. Very satisfying.

Meanwhile, I have just been reminded by Sean Keaveney on Radio 2 that it will be ten years next week since the force of nature that was Prince ascended the glittering (purple, of course) stairway to Fabulon. I think a little tribute is in order...

The archetypal flamboyant icon of mid-80s to mid-90s pop [alongside Queen Madge, of course], he evolved from the shadow of his idol Rick James into the mega-successful, adored superstar whose death was so widely mourned across the globe. He was not merely a performer, singer and musician, however; he was a brilliant songwriter, too.

And, by way of a tribute to his genius, here are several examples of how his compositions became massive hits for other people:

First up, the one that always makes me cry...

Sinéad O'Connor - Nothing Compares 2U

...lightening the mood somewhat, a clutch of much more uplifting choons...

Chaka Khan - I Feel For You

The Bangles - Manic Monday

...the classic - here featuring an artist who shares a birthday with The Purple One, Sir Tom Jones (Tom Jones)...

Tom Jones - Kiss

...and finally, the man himself:

Prince - Girls & Boys

Prince Rogers Nelson (7th June 1958 – 21st April 2016)

Now Miss Sophisticated, your nose up in the air

It seems very odd today to be doing a post all about celebrating the end of a week, when in fact I have been on annual leave for most of it, and am only in work for one day today - so this feels more like a Monday!

However, traditions are traditions after all...

...so how about some Earth, Wind and Fire to put some sparkle in our step? That'll do nicely.

Thank Disco It's Friday!

Earth Wind & Fire - Let Me Talk

Have a good weekend, all!