Friday 31 May 2013

The new Barbra 'n' Donna?

Among the meanderings in this non-story in The Guardian about Nile Rodgers and the so-called "Summer of Disco", I discovered a gem from the very lovely Jake Shears.

Apparently he "has just recorded a duet with Cher that he compares to an updated version of 'No More Tears (Enough Is Enough)' by Barbra Streisand and Donna Summer"!

Now that would make my summer!

Here's another mightily camp version of the Barbra 'n' Donna classic to tide us over while we wait...

Cher official website

Love to hear percussion

Thank heavens - it's the end of my first (short) week back, and it's time, dear reader, to grab the biggest feather boa we can find, spray those flicks into a crash helmet and boogie on down!

Let's have a bop with the late, great Vicki Sue Robinson (whose birthday it would have been today) and her classic Turn The Beat Around:

Thank Disco It's Friday!

Have a great weekend...

Thursday 30 May 2013

"I hope you weren't hurt..."

Mark Gatiss stars as Joan Crawford and Frances Barber as Bette Davis in a new dark comedy Psychobitches, which features famous women from history in the therapist's chair (or, in this case, waiting room).

Look out, too, for "appearances" from Sylvia Plath, Audrey Hepburn, Eva Peron, Margot Fonteyn and the Bronte Sisters...

Psychobitches is on tonight (30th May 2013) at 9pm on Sky Arts 1 HD.

Utter, utter genius!

Wednesday 29 May 2013

Cami-knickered rent boys, women-only poetry, melon slices, bad movies and Shakespeare's slut sister

[Photo courtesy of DJ (Diane) Connell]

Our usual gang was somewhat depleted last night (which meant less of a struggle to grab space), as little Tony, Emma, Toby and I took our places for "London's peerless gay literary salon" Polari. John-John had the "dreaded lurgy", our Paul was celebrating his 60th birthday in Berlin (as you do) with Jim, and Ange had some serious family matters to deal with.

Blinking in the daylight that illuminated the beautiful landmarks of the South Bank, we nevertheless looked forward (as always) to a cracking evening's entertainment. And (as always - see my earlier blog) we were not disappointed...

Hosting the show with his usual multi-costumed flair, Mr Paul Burston introduced our first reader - a newbie to Polari (although very much a regular in the audience), and her first time "reading for a mixed audience" (she is a stalwart of women-only socials hosted by Kenric lesbian group and the like) - Anny Knight.

She read for us a plethora of her short poems in a seamless stream - some personal, some emotional, most acutely observational and often very funny - but none (frustratingly) to be found anywhere on the web. We thoroughly enjoyed being taken along for the ride, however, and look forward to more when the publishers come knocking (which they surely will).

Next up was a man who Paul introduced as "actor, dancer, escort, porn star and tantric masseur - and now, author" Greg Mitchell. Whew, what a CV! Another newbie to the literary world, Mr Mitchell read from his as-yet-unpublished work, telling (a semi-autobiographical?) tale about a rather kinky punter, his preoccupation with silky underwear, the rent boy he hires to fulfil his fantasies - and a cute taxi driver who shows rather an interest in the whole fetish, much to the protagonist's delight.

Hot stuff - he must get a publisher soon! Visit Greg's blog.

Completing the entertainment for the first half, it was the long-overdue and very welcome return of the lovely Miss Sophia Blackwell - who we hadn't seen here since March 2012!

Darling of the stubbornly individual, maquillage-loving alternative lesbian world, Miss Blackwell was described by no less a luminary than Stella Duffy thus: "Some of Sophia Blackwell's poems read like Nico should be singing them to John Cale's viola, some as if Shakespeare's slut sister taught him all he knew, others are as new as the next dawn. Dirty, juicy, knowing, open - works for me.". She launched into a few of her best "performance poetry" pieces, including this rather lovely one, written for the wedding of two friends - When It Finds You:

And this pithy number - Tell Me:

I adore her - visit Sophia's website for more.

[Photo courtesy of krysphotos]

After the break, it was the turn of our fave VG (Val) Lee to take to the stand.

A trouper of the highest order (Val has recently added stand-up comedy to her long list of achievements, that also includes a regular column in the aristo magazine The Lady), she entertained us to two of her cherished works, her first (and possibly only) entry into world of erotica A Slice of Melon, and the hilarious Shush (both of which she read for the LGBT History Month audience at Islington Waterstones in February).

Fabulously entertaining, as always - Val inevitably always has her audience in the palm of her hand. And as such, she's a difficult act to follow...

However our headliner, the utterly charming Christopher Fowler, is certainly up to that challenge. Reading some insightful pieces from his "scurrilous memoir about his career in the British film industry", Film Freak, he soon had the packed house engrossed.

Often hilariously funny (his "Pied Piper" poster for Michael Jackson understandably never saw the light of day, coming as it did in the middle of accusations of child molestation against the megastar), poignant (the sad, slow decline of the British film industry and its original home in Soho's Wardour Street - all restaurants and bars these days) and really moving (the emotions surrounding the death of Chris's partner Jim Sturgeon), the book is indeed an engrossing and unique insight into the sordid stories behind the tricky art of making movies in grim, depressed and depressing 1970s Britain.

You can listen to Mr Fowler talking about Film Freak, in conversation with reviewer Tim Haigh, in this podcast:

Read more of Mr Fowler's incredibly imaginative writing - and order a copy of the book - via his blog.

[Photo courtesy of krysphotos]

Another grand night out, loads of laughs, a lovely (and very mixed - not just in the sense to which Ms Knight refers) audience, much schmoozing and camaraderie - I love it!

Can't wait for the next one - on Wednesday 26th June 2013 - at which the UK's most famous gay soldier Lance Corporal James Wharton is our headline reader. Also announced is historical horror writer Jack Wolf. Others to be confirmed in due course, no doubt.


Costa del Carrington?

Oh my gawd... Can this programme get any more camp? According to the BBC:
Joan Collins is heading back to the small screen to join the cast of ITV sitcom Benidorm.

The former Dynasty star will play hotel guest "Crystal" in the forthcoming sixth series of the show, set in the Spanish resort.

Collins played Alexis Carrington Colby in the 1980s drama alongside Linda Evans as her rival Krystle Carrington.

The actress told fans: "I'm playing Crystal, yes I am!! But not the Dynasty one."
More about Benidorm.

Miss Imrie presents...

I went to another marvellous party at "London's peerless gay literary salon" Polari last night.

While I gather my skirts together and assemble my review of said occasion, here's a wonderful insight into the joys to which we are treated - as none other than national treasure and gay icon Miss Celia Imrie took the stage last month...

[Video recorded and edited by Trace-Media]

Celia Imrie on IMDB

Tuesday 28 May 2013

What you want is what you don't know

Lest we forget, it is yet another diva day - our fabulous Princess Kylie's 45th birthday!

I have posted about the lovely Miss Minogue many, many times over the years, but today I thought I'd feature the classic "City of London" video of a giant Kylie, parading around the locality of my sister's wedding party a few weeks ago - it's Giving You Up:

Kylie Minogue official website

The old, old story

A very difficult morning. I have had to force myself up and out of bed, and back to the joys of work...

To brighten the situation up, here's the fantabulosa house fave here at Dolores Delargo Towers Uriel Yekutiel, entering into a bitch-fight dance competition with another drag wannabee over a hunky stud (the old, old story...)!

If this doesn't cheer you up, nothing will!

The whole shebang is to advertise the opening gambit for the international Gay Pride season - Tel Aviv Pride on 7th June 2013.

The music is by Israeli pop sensation Omer Adam.

Monday 27 May 2013


Farewell then, Bill Pertwee, best known as the bolshy "ARP Warden Hodges" in Dad's Army.

So now there's only Ian Lavender ("Pike"), Frank Williams ("the Vicar" - pictured left above, with Bill Pertwee and Dame Vera Lynn) and the series' co-writer Jimmy Perry left...

William Desmond Anthony Pertwee MBE (21st July 1926 - 27th May 2013)

Tacky Music Triptych

Ah, sunshine and lazy days. I never tire of them - and this bank holiday promises to provide just that! In my idyll on yet another day away from the office (the last one of almost a fortnight off), I haven't forgotten it is a Tacky Music Monday...

Today, joy of joys, we have not one, not two, but three sparkling performances to brighten up our lives (thanks to another glut of birthdays of our favourite showbiz ladies). And because I love you.

First up is the multi-talented Broadway singer and actress Miss Leslie Uggams, who celebrated her 70th birthday on Saturday 25th May - here with her stunning take on the classic Fascinatin' Rhythm.

[Thanks to dear Thombeau and his (sadly now very) Redundant Variety Hour for this one!]

Next, we couldn't let the late, great Miss Peggy Lee's birthday (yesterday - 26th May) go by without paying due homage - here she is in a wonderfully weird "literal" interpretation of her classic Fever:

Finally, a little closer to home, the National Treasure that is Cilla Black OBE celebrates not only her 50th anniversary in showbiz this year, but also blows out 70 candles on her cake today! Here is the lady herself (from her 70s TV show, dancing with someone who looks like a "Jason King" wannabee) with a completely over-the-top routine for You're So Vain:

Divas, all!

Sunday 26 May 2013

Gonna walk on by, gonna walk on through

[Photos from the gardens at Dolores Delargo Towers]

Timeslip moment once again...

Can twenty years really have slipped by so quickly since this fantastic number took the dancefloors by storm?

From this week in 1993, it's Sub Sub featuring Melanie Williams (and whatever happened to her?) - Ain't No Love, Ain't No Use.

Perfect for a sunny Bank Holiday weekend, methinks!

Sub Sub apparently abandoned "fun" altogether and became the dreary indie band The Doves.

Saturday 25 May 2013

Reach out

Sad news today, as we learn that Olivia Newton-John's sister Rona has lost her battle with brain cancer.

About Rona:
  • She was married to the late Grease star Jeff Conaway ("Kenickie") from 1980 to 1985.
  • She appeared in several TV series including The Benny Hill Show and Gerry Anderson’s UFO, and played "Ty"'s therapist in the movie Sordid Lives.
  • In 1972 Olivia and Rona recorded a duet together Just Us Two.

Here's ONJ singing an appropriate song - the Bacharach & David number Reach Out For Me (sandwiched between some over-acting ladies and what I can only assume is an odd Japanese version of Loose Women):

Rona Newton-John (1943 - 25th May 2013)

Friday 24 May 2013

Thought for the day

Gay scouts

See the well-dressed creatures

I may have been away from the grindstone all this week (but I was actually studying for an exam, which I took yesterday morning) - however, we still look forward to le weekend with glitter in our hearts...

To that end, on this, Miss Patti LaBelle's birthday, let's try and emulate the "Space Age Tinfoil Outfit" look as best we can in the estimable company of Patti, Nona and Sarah.

Are You Lonely? Not with these girls around, you're not!

Thank Disco It's Friday!

Patti LaBelle (born 24th May 1944)

LaBelle on Wikipedia

Thursday 23 May 2013

Golden girls

Proving that the adage "where there's life, there's hope" is certainly true - in their cases, at least - here are a few more of this week's birthday girls, each of whom carried on performing (and knocking many a much younger "artiste" into a cocked hat in the process) well into their later years...

George's auntie and star of stage, screen and record charts, Rosemary Clooney (23rd May 1928 - 29th June 2002):

Puerto Rican superstar (and senator) Ruth Fernandez (23rd May 1919 – 9th January 2012):

Veteran of the original Big Band era Helen O'Connell (23rd May 1920 – 9th September 1993):

Greek legend (and the only one still with us) Marinella (born 20th May 1938):


Oranges are not the only fruit

More diva birthday madness! Not only is is the not-yet Dame Joan Collins's 80th birthday today, it is also the birthday of one of our own treasured musical favourites - the Spanish superstar Mónica Naranjo!

Here, for a change is "Señorita Orange Tree"* in a more restrained mood than usual (even if her hair isn't) - from way back in 1994, it's Sola:

Here she is back in full throttle, surrounded by her safety gays, with (a song that reminds me a helluva lot of Anastacia's I'm Outta Love) Sacrificio:

But of course, no celebration of Miss Naranjo would be complete without featuring this one (again)... With probably my favourite video ever, it's the magnificent Amor Y Lujo !

Mónica Naranjo website

* "Naranjo" is "Orange Tree" in Spanish.

Wednesday 22 May 2013

Yesterday, when we were young(ish)

Madam Arcati and I celebrate fifteen years together this month! [We don't mark a single date, that much detail is forgotten by both of us...]

When we first met in May 1998, we were both (through complicated circumstances) residents of his home town Plymouth, and both were desperate to get out (he to return to London, me to leave a city whose original novelty when I moved there two years earlier had faded to boredom) - which we did, of course. The world back then was very different - Tony Blair was still "the golden boy" Prime Minister, President Clinton faced shame and scandal, Diana's death was still causing ripples and accusations of conspiracy (mainly from Mohammed Al-Fayed), the Good Friday Agreement on Northern Ireland was signed (yet atrocities still went on), and Posh and Becks were merely engaged.

To mark this significant achievement, here is a selection of the music that was around at that time when everything was new and uncertain (both of us were wary of commitment at the time, and neither expected this to amount to a "relationship"), and our life in Plymouth was a whorl of nights out, pubbing and clubbing...

At Number 1 in the charts this week in May '98 was the "bouncing song" (for that is exactly how our then friend Billy used to dance to it) - Run DMC vs Jason Nevins - It's Like That:

The Spice Girls - Stop had gone straight in at Number 2:

Our Glorious Leader Madonna had just dropped from the Top 3 with Frozen:

Still holding on in the Top 10 was Cornershop and the brilliant Brimful of Asha:

The Ballad of Tom Jones by Space featuring Cerys from Catatonia was just dropping down the charts - a song that remains high on our playlist, even today:

And, finally... just arrived in the charts, but one we'd been dancing to for a while - Kylie and Breathe (Sash! Club Mix):

Happy Anniversary, darling!

Tuesday 21 May 2013

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah!

It's the gorgeous Tom Daley's nineteenth birthday today...

Any excuse - on this grim and cold day - to let a bit of sunshine and uber-totty into our lives!

He's sexy. And he knows it.

Tom Daley official website

Gnome sweet gnome?

The Royal Horticultural Society has lifted its century-old ban on gnomes for this year's Chelsea Flower Show.

There's only one song I can play, really...

Gnome-mania in The Guardian

Monday 20 May 2013

Dark Lady

It's a day for diva celebrations, it seems! Grace Jones' birthday yesterday - and today, Miss Cherilyn Sarkisian, better known as Cher, blows out 67 candles...

In recognition of the lady's eternal contribution to the world of fashion - it is Tacky Music Monday, after all - here she is in yet another understated outfit, singing the rarely-heard classic Dark Lady:

Happy birthday to a truly awesome woman.

Cher official website

Can't you hear me singing for you baby?

After a magnificent weekend - joint birthday celebrations (with curry!) for Alistair and not-so-Baby Steve on Friday, the David Bowie is exhibition and our triumphal Eurovision party on Saturday, and sunshine yesterday to finish it off - it is another Tacky Music Monday already!

I am actually on study leave this week, so the dreariness of returning to the office is not a problem (for once)... but to cheer up those of you who are heading off to another week of drudgery, here's a suitably OTT appearance from Miss Grace Jones (who celebrated her 65th birthday yesterday) on the Italian TV show Stryx - introduced by none other than another Patron Saint Miss Amanda Lear - it's Fame:

Fame, had to make me a name,
Nothing less than the best for me,
Fame, trading love for a name,
And there's no one to blame but me,
You were the one and you loved me,
I rode to stardom to take your place oh,
You were the one that I needed,
But stars would be glowing so far above
Just screaming crowd.

Fame or you?
Can't you hear me singing for you baby?
Fame or you?
Come on back, I need you, won't you save me?

Fame, burning bright as a flame,
But it drove you away from me,
Fame, whats the use of this game,
If I can't have you back with me?
Making the big time, making the money,
Somehow it don't seem to take your place
Oh, I'm never alone but I'm lonely,
I searched through the crowd
And I never see your face.

Fame or you?
Can't you hear me singing for you baby?
Fame or you?
Come on back, I need you, won't you save me?

Fame, gonna drive me insane,
Like it drove you away from me,
Fame, so alone with my name,
even that don't belong to me,
Running away won't help me forget you,
I've got to find you and end this race oh...
Life like a road is so lonely,
Fame and all, they are one night stands
That will never take your place.

Fame or you?
Can't you hear me singing for you baby?
Fame you?
Come on back, I need you, won't you save me?

Fame, whats the use of this game
If I can't have you back with me?
Fame, all alone with my name,
Even that don't belong to me.
Fame, tried to make me a name,
I've got no one to blame but me.
Fame, gonna drive me insane,
like it drove you away from me.
Fame, tried to make me a name,
I've got no one to blame but me.

The World of Grace Jones website

Sunday 19 May 2013

"Sweden has a sense of humour" shocker!

One of the absolute highlights of the Eurovision Song Contest was our host in Malmo, Miss Petra Mede!

Proving that Sweden is not all about Ingmar Bergman, Greta Garbo and sensible cars, she provided us with possibly the best interval entertainment since... Well, actually, I can't think of another like this:

The full lyrics may be found on - of all places - the website of The Mirror.

We wuz robbed again - but alcohol is free!

"I'm sure a lot of people will be disappointed on my behalf but I have really enjoyed my Eurovision experience."

"I did the best that I could do with a great song. I don't feel down and I'm ready to party!"
- Bonnie Tyler

It's becoming a bit like a mantra every year, but "we wuz robbed - again!"

In what is increasingly becoming a Scandinavia-Eastern Europe song contest (with all that "let's vote for our neighbours" predictability), Bonnie's UK entry Believe in Me came 19th out of 26 countries at Eurovision 2013 in Malmo, Sweden last night.

We shouted, we cheered, we booed - to no avail. At least we beat France, Spain, Germany and Ireland.

Denmark's Emmelie de Forest (bafflingly - it's not a great song) won it with Only Teardrops:

According to the votes at our party however (apart from darling Bonnie), it was this sparkling Shakira-like entry by Alyona Lanskaya from Belarus - Solayoh - that should have taken the crown:

A close contender according to the Dolores Delargo Towers jury was this astonishing performance from Romanian entrant Cezar with It's My Life. I want his jacket!

We also gave kudos to the ultimate party anthem from Greece (Koza Mostra feat Agathon Iakovidis - Alcohol Is Free), the controversial "lesbian kiss" from Finland (Krista Siegfrids - Marry Me) and the very clever performance from Azerbaijan (Farid Mammadov - Hold Me, who also got the "totty vote").

Despite the results (and the welter of complete dross that seemed to get high votes such as the Netherlands and Italy), as always, we had a magnificent dressing-up party!

We danced until the wee small hours. The buffet was a cornucopia of food from across the continent. There was enough booze for three parties. Two bags of plates, cups and bottles have gone out for the bin men. This morning we're hoovering up sequins, wig hair, streamers, glitter, feathers and salted pretzels.

And everyone enjoyed themselves! That, after all, is the point of the Eurovision Song Contest.

Eurovision Song Contest 2013 results page

Saturday 18 May 2013

If you just believe in the things that your eyes can see

And so, it is the day...

The Gay World Cup is here! Our flags are up, our costumes are at the ready - Tonight we crack open the "booze of all nations" for the Eurovision Song Contest.

Our hopes rest with Bonnie Tyler and Believe in Me, the UK entry for 2013. It is definitely a song that has grown on me, but will it win?

You say you don't believe in signs from up above
And you laugh at the thought of putting your faith in stuff like love
You never see the rainbow you just curse the rain
You say you wanna believe
But it's just not worth the pain today

That's all fine if that's how you want it to be
But if you're feeling alone and afraid and you can't breathe

Believe in me yeah
Believe in me yeah
Believe in
The way I look at you
And stand beside you
The way I speak the truth
I'd never lie to you
If you just believe in the things that your eyes can see
Believe in me

You come and you go when there's never no compromise that's why
The seconds and the minutes of the days of your life
Go crawling by

That's all fine it that's how you want it to be
But you're feeling along and afraid and you can't breathe

Believe in me yeah
Believe in
The way I look at you
And stand beside you
The way I speak the truth
I'd never lie to you
If you just believe in the things that your eyes can see
Believe in me

What'ya gonna do when your ship is sinking
And you're crying out for help
And just a seagull's listening
In the dark of the night in the middle of the fight
When you're reaching out for something and there's nothing

Believe in me yeah
Believe in me
The way I look at you
And stand beside you
The way I speak the truth
I'd never lie to you
If you just believe in the things that your eyes can see
Believe in me

We believe in you, Bonnie. Bonnie! Bonnie! Bonnie! Oy! Oy! Oy!

Eurovision Song Contest 2013 in Malmo, Sweden

Friday 17 May 2013

Glitterballs, cheap tarts, old queens and Eurovision

I haven't forgotten that this should be our regular celebration of the end of another week, despite the fact that I am on leave. Some traditions have to be maintained...

We also cannot let this week go by without marking the fact that it is the "Gay World Cup" tomorrow - the Eurovision Song Contest! Yay! We will of course be celebrating in our traditional raucous fashion, with a big dressing-up-and-voting-and-drinking party here at Dolores Delargo Towers.

Today is special for a third reason, too - it is our friend Baby Steve's 40th birthday! No longer a "baby"...

So, speaking of parties, glitterballs, cheap tarts, old queens and Eurovision - here's the long-forgotten 2004 entry from Bosnia-Herzegovia, the not-gay-at-all Deen and In The Disco:

Thank Disco It's Friday!

Happy Birthday, Steve!

Look inside, look inside your tiny mind

Today marks the 9th annual International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia (IDaHo), and it is important to remember some salient facts.
  • Across the world, 78 countries criminalise same-sex relationships. In nine countries, sanctions can go as high as the death sentence.
  • An estimated six million LGBT students worldwide drop out of school because of harassment by peers and by staff; and the suicide rate amongst LGBT teenagers across the world is disproportionately high compared to perceived "straight" peers.
  • There were 1,123 reported killings of transgender people in 57 countries between 2008 and 2012.
In Russia several authorities have adopted laws banning “homosexual propaganda”, and there is a very real threat this will become federal law. In Eastern Europe, many former Soviet states are increasingly adopting the same anti-gay rhetoric and legislation.

In the US, the recent coming-out of black baseballer Jason Collins opened the floodgates for a wave of nasty-minded (racist as well as) homophobic bigots to "exercise their democratic right to free speech".

Despite major progress towards equality in states such as Argentina, Brazil and Uruguay, there is a dangerous wave of Catholic-sponsored bigotry pervading other Latin American countries such as Venezuela and Ecuador.

In Africa, post-colonial evangelical churches with homophobic views hold the balance of power in a vast majority of its nations; and across the Arab and Islamic world, the rise of homophobic fundamentalism shows no sign of abating.

Even here in so-called enlightened Europe, the recent attempts to get a law legalising gay marriage in France had a vicious struggle to face before being adopted by its parliament.

To mark this year's IDaHo, I went along to a thoroughly enlightening and absorbing lecture (hosted by those marvellous people at the Gay and Lesbian Humanists Association - GALHA), as Dr Matt Cook of Birkbeck College spoke on the subject of "Britain's Sexual Revolution". Taking the period commonly associated with sexual revolution in Britain - roughly between 1965 and 1970 - and its "astonishing pace of change", he put the momentous events of that era and beyond into context against the background of the puritanical post-1945 period that saw more persecution (and prosecutions) of LGBT people in Britain than had ever before been recorded.

And here is the entire talk, in full:

[Check about 8:10 into part four to see someone you might know asking a question!]

It will take some effort for those of you who did not attend to sit through the whole two hours - but it is well worth watching, to learn some surprising facts about modern LGBT history and our journey from post-war pariahs to the burgeoning sense of progress towards equality we (privileged citizens of a Western democracy) in the UK are experiencing today. I found it utterly fascinating...

Of course, there is a simpler message - as is traditional on this day every year at Dolores Delargo Towers - to address all homophobes wherever they lurk across the world:

If you haven't done anything to show your support for IDaHo yet, the official website has some "quick fix" ideas.

Taking a more camp approach to awareness-raising, there is also a "flashmob" planned for 5pm today in Trafalgar Square - hordes of people are expected to take part in a synchronised "big dance", to Beyoncé's Single Ladies! Shame I can't be there...

Previous blogs about IDaHo may be found here, here and here.

Thursday 16 May 2013

Thinking of becoming an author?

Expert advice on how to write a bestseller, courtesy of the ever-fabulous Fascinating Aida:

We adore these ladies! - and went to see them in their fantabulosa live show back in January 2012.

Fascinating Aida website

It's Scott Walker, bitch!

Ever wanted to hear what Scott Walker - that enigmatic doyenne of moody torch songs and avant-garde chanson, beloved of Marc Almond, the late Billy Mackenzie (Associates) and Neil Hannon (The Divine Comedy) among others - would sound like if he decided to do a cover of and Britney's godawful Scream and Shout?

Now you can! - courtesy of comedian Adam Buxton:


[2019 UPDATE: The original has gone from the interwebs, so this is the "Squeegee remix".]

Wednesday 15 May 2013

Immortal Eno

"A part of me has become immortal, out of my control."

One of the most influential musicians of our time, Mr Brian Peter George St. John le Baptiste de la Salle Eno celebrates his 65th birthday today.

Acknowledged for his inspiration on myriad diverse artists including Bowie, Talking Heads, Devo, Public Image Ltd, U2, Aphex Twin, John Foxx, Chrissie Hynde and the Pretenders, LCD Soundsystem, David Sylvian, MGMT, William Orbit and even Coldplay, his work has incorporated world music, ambient and electronic experimentation and embryonic forms of hip-hop.

In short, a genius. Here he is in a rare solo appearance not long after he left Roxy Music - Seven Deadly Finns:

Happy birthday, Mr Eno!

Paul Morley interviews Brian Eno

My previous blog about Mr Eno

Tuesday 14 May 2013

Emeralds are a girl's best friend

Congratulations to the lovely Caro Emerald, Dutch diva of jolly jazzy cabaret numbers, whose second album The Shocking Miss Emerald has debuted at Number 1 in the UK album charts.

I adored her first album Deleted Scenes From The Cutting Room Floor, and I look forward to hearing the new one. She's a sassy lady - her persistence in getting her music noticed, long before getting a record deal (she was championed by both Jools Holland and Terry Wogan), is the stuff of legend, and she still retains full artistic control over her productions. Here are a few of her choons to cheer us up.

And the new one, Tangled Up:

She's wonderful!

Caro Emerald official website

My previous blog featuring Miss Emerald

Monday 13 May 2013

Hey There

I am aching from digging and potting and planting the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers (before the downpour - typical UK Spring), and completely not in the mood to get up and about for work this morning. Never mind, it's only for a couple of days - I'm off on leave from Wednesday (yay!) ...

Let us not forget that today would have been the 91st birthday of one of our ultimate Patron Saints, Miss Bea Arthur - and this Tacky Music Monday, we have not only the great lady herself, but also Rock Hudson, Melba Moore and Wayland Flowers and Madame to cheer us along! Hey There Good Times, indeed!

RIP, darling Bea.

Sunday 12 May 2013

I just adore conversation, don't you?

"This movie is all about two girls on the make, who are on a ship full of homosexuals who have no interest in them whatosever."

It's Tired Old Queen At The Movies (aka Steve Hayes) again, drooling over what is, in fact, one of the gayest mainstream movies of all time...

...Gentlemen Prefer Blondes!

A perfect way to fill a rain break from tarting up the gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers, methinks.

Saturday 11 May 2013

T'aint no big thing

I'm so excited! The BBC Proms season tickets have gone on sale today, and as usual my first priority is the grand finalé.

I have just booked two tickets to the ultimate season-closer, our annual pilgrimage, Proms in the Park - starring tenor Joseph Calleja, Nigel Kennedy, Sir Terry Wogan, the BBC Concert Orchestra, Dame Edna Everage...

...and none other than Bryan Ferry!


T'aint no big thing,
To wait for the bell to ring,
T'aint no big thing,
The toll of the bell

Aggravated - spare for days,
Stroll downtown the red light place,
Jump up bubble up - what's in store,
Love is the drug and I need to score

Showing out, showing out, hit and run,
Boy meets girl and the beat goes on,
Stitched up tight, cant shake free,
Love is the drug, got a hook on me

Oh oh catch that buzz,
Love is the drug that I'm thinking of,
Yeah, cant you see?
Love is the drug for me

T'aint no big thing,
To wait for the bell to ring,
T'aint no big thing,
The toll of the bell

Late that night I park my car,
Stake my place in the singles bar,
Face to face, toe to toe,
Heart to heart as we hit the floor

Lumber up, limbo down,
The locked embrace, the stumble round,
I say go, she say yes,
Dim the lights, you can guess the rest

Yeah, catch that buzz,
Love is the drug that I'm thinking of,
Yeah, cant you see?
Love is the drug for me

T'aint no big thing,
To wait for the bell to ring,
T'aint no big thing,
The toll of the bell

Aggravated - spare for days,
Stroll downtown the red light place,
Jump up bubble up - what's in store,
Love is the drug and I need to score

Showing out, showing out, hit and run,
Boy meets girl and the beat goes on,
Stitched up tight, cant shake free,
Love is the drug, got a hook on me

Oh oh catch that buzz,
Love is the drug that I'm thinking of,
Oh oh, cant you see?
Love is the drug for me

Book yours today: BBC Proms in the Park, 7th September 2013.

My tribute to Roxy Music on their 40th anniversary.

Bryan Ferry website