Of sackings, shoes, Tallulah and Darragh

It's another snippets post, dear reader...

• Dance with the Devil news: Poor Prince William had to put on his best statesmanly grimace for a meeting with President-elect Trump in Paris to discuss "the special relationship" between the UK and the US.

• Auntie Beeb does it again news: In another in a long line of "let's really piss our loyal audience off" moves [see also Paul O'Grady and Clare Teal], one of our favourite broadcasters, host of Radio 3's In Tune for 27 years Sean Rafferty has been unceremoneously replaced axed! We are so pissed off. Again.

  Mind you, the "send-off" on his last show on Friday was a remarkably emotional show of support - as the "great and the good" of the classical world and beyond turned up to play and sing music, and make toasts all dedicated to him, including Ailish Tynan, Marcus Farnsworth, Nicky Spence, Barokksolistene, Anna Tilbrook, Dame Sarah Connolly, Angela Hewitt, Elena Urioste, Tom Poster, Guy Johnston, fellow Radio 3 presenter Tom Service, and none other than Dame Joanna Lumley!

• It'll still be dry as fuck news: Xmas turkeys are on sale in Holland Park in London [Eddie and Patsy's neighbourhood], ranging from £81.13 for a 6lb bird to a whopping £363.38 for a 28-pounder! I think we'll stick to pork. Or duck. Or anything that tastes nicer than turkey.
• Pity she's a whore news: Remarkably, an archaic police power - the issue of a "prostitute's caution", that, unlike any other similar sanction, remains on record for life - is still being exercised in the UK today! No wonder the girls are angry about it.
• There's expensive shoes, and then there's bloody expensive shoes: Those ruby slippers worn by Judy Garland that went to auction with a pre-sale estimate of £4 million? Ah, yes. They sold for $28 million (£22m)!! There's some rich queens out there...

• And finally: RIP, Broadway trouper Miss Helen Gallagher, at the ripe old age of 98. She wasn't exactly a "household name", but I discovered this marvellous little video of her performing as Tallulah Bankhead which suggests she would indeed have been "our kind of girl"...

Helen Gallagher in Tallulah

And the weather? Another cunty "named storm" - Storm Darragh - has battered the crap out of Wales and the West of England, and even here in London the gales are fierce!

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STOP PRESS:

Sorry, Krampus!

...we missed your "Nacht"!

On the cover of a magazine

Prince William adorns the cover of Attitude gay magazine - a first for the Royal Family - and talks about bullying:

"What I would say to any young person reading this who's being bullied for their sexuality: don't put up with it - speak to a trusted adult, a friend, a teacher, Childline, Diana Award or some other service and get the help you need.

"You should be proud of the person you are and you have nothing to be ashamed of."

How fab!

Not so common now, am I?

A poignant photo at the Taj Mahal has given the Duchess of Cambridge a fresh opportunity to tell her husband’s exes to eat it.

The Duchess said the image would be ‘something else for them to remember’ in 30 years’ time, when they are not the Queen and she is.

Kate sent the photo to William’s teenage sweetheart, Jecca Craig, with a note saying: “Oh look, who’s this being as iconic as fuck? It’s definitely not you, you stupid hippy.”

To Tess Shepherd, who was pictured with William during the couple’s brief split in 2007, she wrote: “Yet another massive defeat for the forces of skankery.

“Have a nice day not being on holiday with a prince. Eat that, you minger.”

And to Isabella Calthorpe, once regarded as William’s favourite, she wrote: “Not so common now, am I? Taj fucking Mahal. The Big One.”

She added: “YOU ARE AN ARSE!”

The Daily Mash

Of course.

Highlights...

That dress:



The vows:



The totty!


Kate's brother, James Middleton

Willy

The minister for Culture Media 'n' Sport has said that photos of the Royal Family taken by paparazzi should not be published. Alessandro Copetti, who took the picture published in the Evening Standard, defended his conduct, saying the image had been taken "in a civilised and controlled manner".

Apparently it wasn't this one:



Nor this even more obviously faked one [NSFW]

Read the far less interesting story