Showing posts with label Chris Chalmers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chris Chalmers. Show all posts

Sunday, 29 January 2017

A steam room tsunami, missing ceili dancers, visual poetry, a run through London and a unicorn


[photo: Justin David]

It was the first outing for "London's peerless gay literary salon" Polari - proudly entering its tenth year in business - on Friday and John-John and I duly joined a whole host of familiar regulars in the audience (including Emma, Toby, sexy Lexi, Val Lee, Suzie Feay, Karen McLeod, Anya Nyx and the rest) to welcome it in.


[photo: Justin David]

Host Paul Burston - whose own latest novel, the mystery crime thriller The Black Path was published in the autumn - teased us with the suggestion that something "very special indeed" was planned for the tenth anniversary, then proudly introduced the evening's impressive line-up...


[photo: Justin David]

...opening with the lovely Chris Chalmers - another regular attendee and fêted author, "long-listed" for the Polari First Book Prize in 2013. For us, he read from his latest novel Light From Other Windows, an intriguing tale of how a family's secrets unravel in the wake of the dramatic death of the youngest son in a tsunami that swamps Tenerife. The boy had kept a meticulous blog that painfully exposes his insights into the character of each and every one of them, and shockingly reveals that he had a few secrets of his own.

In order to save us from the full trauma so early in the evening, Mr Chalmers focused in on one of the family members, gay Jem, a gym-bunny and - it would seem - less-than-faithful boyfriend, as he is tempted by the (low-hanging) fruit of another in the steam-room of a posh hotel. Phew!


[photo: Justin David]

Dampening our ardour after that little fantasy session was the task that fell to Ann Mann (who, as I observed when she last read for us back at Xmas 2013, was one of the original members of The George Mitchell Singers - aka The Black & White Minstrels - and stalwart of BBC broadcasting) gave us a rather intriguing snippet from her new book Arcanum. A mystery of dramatic proportions, the tale revolves around the disappearance without trace of an entire coach-load of Irish folk dancers, interwoven with the ghosts and superstitions, premonitions and magic that permeate the history of the Emerald Isle.


[photo: Justin David]

How does one follow so many layers of mystery? With an audio-visual extravaganza, of course! For every poem Mr Nathan Evans (for it was he) read from the anthology Threads, he displayed an accompanying visual by the ever-lovely Justin David (also our "official photographer" for the night) - some of them quite hilarious. The poems he read for us explored life, domesticity, observations on urban living and relationships - and here he is reading a couple at the book's launch in the autumn:


Grabbing the chance during the break for a drink and a fag and a bit of a catch-up on all the gossip, it was soon time to resume our seats for a brace of top-notch readers.


[photo: Justin David]

First up, the superb Rosie Garland (aka "Rosie Lugosi"), author of the darkly gothic novels The Palace of Curiosities and Vixen - and with another The Night Brother on its way, it's a wonder she has found the time to write poetry as well. However, an anthology of her own poetry As in Judy is out now - and, from the poems she read for us, it will be brilliant!

How about the dreams of a young tomboy?
When You Grow Up
At night, she leaps and does not land. Spreads her arms and soars
above the fenced and neatly weeded garden. Her dreams
are practice sessions where she lifts cars, sees through walls, fights

dragons. She is a pirate captain, a queen, a horse. She is neither girl
nor boy: the distinctions are irrelevant when her small body encompasses
male and female, human, beast. A turbulent child figure-heading

the prow of her beaked ship, she buckles on armour, rescues
princesses from spinning wheels and charming princes,
fearless of the shapes beneath the bed. Too soon

she hears the call: Breakfast! Now! Blinks this world into focus.
Hushes battle cries, sets her teeth against the summons
to dolls, dresses, a future sweet with happy-ever- afters

and you’ll change. You’ll see. She sheathes her sword
between the pages of her book. Every bedtime her mother tucks in
the sheet of husband, marriage, children: tucks it in tight.
Or in complete contrast - a unicorn?


Even our estimable headliner Stella Duffy OBE was full of enthusiasm for Ms Garland's performance. Praise, indeed, from the author of fourteen novels, fifty short stories, ten plays and numerous articles; co-director of the Fun Palaces campaign for wider participation in all forms of arts and culture; and winner (twice) of the Stonewall Writer of the Year award.

She also congratulated Paul on the longevity of Polari - with a dire warning to the assembled audience to treasure it and never to take such things for granted (referring to events across the pond): "rights can so easily be taken away in an instant".


[photo: Justin David]

Ms Duffy's newest work is the historical novel London Lies Beneath - based on the true tragic story of the boys of the 2nd Walworth Scout troop, who drowned off Leysdown on 4 August 1912. However, it from was the optimistic early section of the book that Stella read for us, as the exuberant boys run all the way from Trafalgar Square back home [and if you so wish, you can follow the route yourself]:
These lads want to go out, yes, see the world, but they want to come home as well. London is home.

London, but not this London, up town London. Home is the other side of the river. That's Big Ben ringing out the hour and so the three boys have their task - ready, set, go. Running now, along the Strand, dodging trams and carriages, swiftly round the copper who doesn't want dirty lads from the wrong side of the river running along his patch, doesn't trust them as far as he could throw them. A quick stop at St Mary le Strand, once round the church as they promised they always will, it would be cheating just to turn the corner to the river, then fast over Waterloo Bridge to the south, to home. Real London, the London that is beneath. Beneath the fancy shops of the north side, beneath the big white houses with their bells and whistles and servants upstairs and downstairs and in my lady's chamber, beneath the lower lip of the river that swells full and rich with the tide, shrinking back to mud flats and dirty docks twice a day. Proper London, that's where our boy lived. Lived. Where he and his friends and their families lived, happily enough, scraping out a living but only just, crammed in tight one against the other, spreading out only on high days and holidays and then just for a day trip on the tram, back to the hearth come night, and the hearth cold unless they could scrape up a coin for the coal...

...Nearly there lads, nearly home. A swift sprint down Newington Butts, well and truly breathless by Draper Street, under the train lines, finally, finally, here's Heygate with the big synagogue standing at a diagonal on the corner, then the Cuming and the library, now the dog-leg that is Larcom Street. And here they are, home. Home. Red faces, chests pumping, bare legs stinging in the wind. Not quite three miles and they've done it in under half an hour if the Town Hall clock is right. Course it is, this is the Walworth clock, course it's right. Slap on the back, punch to the arm. Good mate, good lad.
Read in Ms Duffy's inimitable style, we were as breathless as "the lads" by the end. We love listening to her almost as much as we love reading her work.


[photo: Justin David]

And that was it - with only the "curtain call", the applause and our usual round of schmoozing with chums, it was time for the pub!

Our next outing is an LGBT History Month special on 24th February - featuring readings from Tim Murphy, Dr Sebastian Buckle, Leon Craig, Suzi Feay ...and Paul Burston himself!

Faboo.

Viva Polari!

Thursday, 27 June 2013

Young love, middle-aged love, sadistic love, an ironing board, a crumble and Prince Harry



It was a beautiful summer evening yesterday when I trolled across the Hungerford Bridge to the South Bank, on my own this time. Our gang was even more depleted than last month - all at the launch of Marcus Reeves' album, I believe - so it was just me and Roland (the artist formerly of the "Lost Octopus", who told me he has bagged a gig at Summer Rites/Pride in the Park on Saturday afternoon) to grab a space at the top table...



The place was thronged with familiar and not-so-familiar faces, all our regulars (DJ Connell, VG Lee, Peter Daniels, Toby Tobes, Paul's hubby Paulo, et al) plus the ever-controversial Julie Bindel, and Paul's Mum and Dad all the way from Bridgend(!).



Opening the evening's edifications, Miss Antonia Cridland read from her touching gay teenage love story Nathan and Alex. It's her first foray into the world of writing sex scenes between men, but, from the passage she read anyway, she seems to have mastered the "artform" rather well. I got a little hot under the collar at times...

Here she is talking about the book, in an interview at the London Book Fair:




The lovely Chris Chalmers, a familiar face from Polari back in April 2012, read for us this time an extract for his as-yet-unpublished novel Dinner at the Happy Skeleton, involving the sort-of-happy circumstance when a frustrated gay man in the midst of a mid-life crisis receives an invitation (on Gaydar) to - ahem! - hook up with a semi-retired porn star. Hilarious, intriguing, and left us all wondering why on earth that book deal has yet to come Mr Chalmers' way.



Jack Wolf is a master of historical horror fiction. Reading from his Gothic novel The Tale of Raw Head and Bloody Bones, written in the authentic style of the 18th century (all "thees" and "thous" and archaic phrases), he captured simultaneously the looming and mysterious persona of the story's anti-hero Tristan Hunt - "a promising young physician, also, alas, a psychopath" - and the captivating and homoerotic control he has over his young lad companion. Scaling the wall of a locked orchard to gather forbidden fruit, the frisson between the two boys becomes Tristan's own private pleasure when his young friend is caught red-handed and given a thrashing, while Tristan watches... Spooky and menacing stuff, indeed.

Paul wisely took this opportunity to allow us a breather after the highly-charged atmosphere of Gothic horror and smut of the first half.



Opening the second session, however, was an amazing act - the debut at Polari of Vauxhall Tavern favourite, polyester-lover and international cabaret superstar Miss Lorraine Bowen, her ironing board and her Casio organ! I was thrilled - never having seen the lady in one of her legendary off-the-wall performances before. She didn't disappoint. Miss Bowen's forte is to transform the mundane into an almost surreal reality through her songs - she began by (hilariously) demonstrating the things that make up a "classic" song (verse, chorus, bridge, key changes, the lot). Then she sang it:


The Crumble Song - which has apparently been translated into at least five languages including Indian - had us all in stitches, singing along (in fact I couldn't get it out of my head all day in work):

"Everybody's good at cooking something
I'm good at cooking crumble.
I've got one in the oven -
Would you like some?"


Loved it! Miss Bowen proudly boasts five albums' worth of songs she's produced in her long career. If I'd had the cash on me, I'd have bought one there and then. She was a hard act to follow, but...



Our headliner, the rather scrummy Mr James Wharton has a remarkable story to tell. The first gay serviceman to be featured on the front cover of The Soldier magazine (the British Army's official publication), he has served in Iraq, taken part in major state occasions including the State Opening of Parliament, Lord Mayor's Parade, Cenotaph Parade and the Queen's Birthday Parade, and escorted the Sovereign on the occasion of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge's wedding. With his own wedding in March 2010, James and his husband became the first same sex couple to have their relationship formalised in the Household Cavalry's 350 year history, within the walls of the London barracks. He was particularly chuffed to be among the very first uniformed serving members from the British Army to march at Gay Pride in London.

He is quite an accomplished storyteller, too. His most famous anecdote - the book Out in the Army is being serialised in [of all places, but I suppose a girl's gotta eat] The Mail On Sunday - is of the time Prince Harry saved him from being beaten up by troops from another battalion.



I was mightily impressed, if only slightly disappointed he was not in full "Army porn fantasy uniform" (Mr Wharton left the forces earlier this year), and he received a huge round of applause.

And that, unfortunately was it for another Polari, bar the schmoozing.



I adore the sheer eclecticism of these evenings, and look forward to them each and every month.

Next month, alongside luminaries as Neil Alexander and Marco Mancassola, is our very own Ange, reading "some of me poetry" - can't wait!

Polari returns to the 5th floor function room of the Royal Festival Hall on Tuesday 30th July 2013.

Wednesday, 11 April 2012

Dougie Byng and banjoleles, Nancy and masturbation, lynch mobs, drag and a helicopter crash



Mr Paul Burston, impresario of "London's peerless gay literary salon" Polari, certainly knows how to throw a party! With no less than four costume changes during the evening - Victorian military fetish, twisted evening wear, a Debbie Harry t-shirt, and even full drag(!). His selection of guest spécialistes des Belles Lettres gave us a wide and varied evening's entertainment last night - and once more, little Tony, John-John and I had a great time!



Opening the show was the (unpublished) "writer and psychotherapist" Chris Payne, reading some rather smutty extracts from one of his gay-themed works - I guess his forays into the literary world are very fresh indeed, as there is absolutely nothing about him on the web... Entertaining, nonetheless.



Our second reader, the rather buff Mr Chris Chalmers recently won a debut novel competition run by e-publishers Wink Publishing and as a consequence has actually won a publishing deal. His novel Five to One is apparently "coming to a Kindle near you" at the moment. The story is an intriguing one, judging form the taster extract he read. The blurb alone says it all - "Four lives that collide at 12.55 one sunny afternoon, when a helicopter crashes on Clapham Common. It’s a day that changes them all forever - and for one of them, it’s also their last." Leaving us hanging - literally - in mid-air, I am intrigued to find out what happens next...



The lovely Rose Collis is a real treat - we saw her at Polari in May last year, and indeed that performance inspired the lady so much she is now taking her banjoleles 'Bud' and 'Alvin' to the Brighton Fringe. As she says on her website "though it was a short set, the combination of comedy, history and song was a hit with the audience — and it was one of the easiest and best ideas I’ve ever had to develop a full-length show."

The extracts she gave us from the revue Trouser-Wearing Characters were indeed fantastic - she specialises in biographical reminisces of famous gay and lesbian (or just camp) figures such as the journalist and broadcaster Nancy Spain and the marvellous Coral Browne, while performing old Music Hall numbers such as Masculine Women, Feminine Men. Genius! Particularly excellent was her focus on one of our own camp icons here at Dolores Delargo Towers, the "Bawdy But British" drag artiste Douglas Byng.

There is no actual video of Rose performing, unfortunately, but here's Dougie himself:




After the break - and in complete contrast - it was the turn of John R Gordon, reading from his novel Faggamuffin. Set in Jamaica - dubbed the most homophobic country in the world by human rights groups - the passage he read set the scene for the story, as the book's hero the reggae DJ 'Cutty' is discovered in flagrante delecto with another man, and has to flee for his life from a rampaging homophobic lynch mob.

Terrifying stuff, and very near to the bone given the current continued rise of homophobic murders in the Caribbean, Africa and beyond. Mr Gordon is co-founder of the publishing company Team Angelica with Rikki Beadle-Blair, and together they help promote the issues that black gay people face. Read more about John and Fagamuffin in this excellent article from The Voice.



And finally we came to the star performer of the evening, Mr Terry Ronald - friend of Princess Kylie and all-round camp writing genius (who we last saw at the self-same Polari with Ms Collis last May). Reading once again from his 'magnum opus' Becoming Nancy, we were in hysterics at the tale of the young hero David, with his obsession with Debbie Harry and sexual fixation on a shirtless Paul Michael Glaser (even while being - ahem! - relieved by a girl friend of his sister), as he proudly announces to his family that he has landed the part of 'Nancy' in Oliver... John-John kindly purchased a copy of the book for me, which Mr Ronald duly signed - what a lovely man he is.



And to prove it, here he reads another passage from the novel:




Over too soon, and it was just time for a curtain call and to chat with some of the fab regulars (DJ Connell, Val Lee [who is reading for us next month], Alex Hopkins et al) before we were off back to Halfway for the formidable duo of Miss Rose Garden and Mrs Moore in cabaret to finish off the night.

As ever, this was a remarkable and fab night out - it is no wonder we always look forward to Polari every month!



Next month looks very special indeed - for not only does Val have a new book out (which promises to be excellent as always), but we also have a reading from none other than that star of 80s "mock-soap" Brass Miss Barbara Ewing. Also on the bill on 8th May (so far) are Danuta Kean, book editor of Mslexia, and Peter Daniels.

Polari at the Southbank Centre