Wednesday, 5 August 2020

Essential oom-pah for beginners

We are firm believers, Madam Acarti and I, that people need more "oom-pah music" in their lives.

Continuing our mission of enlightenment, and our countdown - as we head up to stay with the boys in Essex to begin our holiday (we depart from Stansted for Amsterdam tomorrow evening) - here are two grootmeesters of that very genre, for your delectation. Former shoe saleswoman Zwaantje van de Belt-Pieters and former plasterer Jan van de Belt [for it is they] had string of hits in the Netherlands over a career that spanned five decades, and this was their greatest...

...all together, now:


Tuesday, 4 August 2020

No one could wish for any better

We're getting excited now! Having spent the day getting clothes and bits ready to take away with us, and potting-on loads of "baby" plants so they don't dry out if the predicted tropical weather this weekend does actually hit, we're definitely in the holiday spirit... let's start the countdown to Amsterdam this Thursday with a most beloved paean to the most gorgeous old city in the world:

Indeed, the lyrics roughly translate as

On the canals of Amsterdam
I have pledged my whole heart forever
Amsterdam fills my thoughts
As the most beautiful city in our country
All the people of Amsterdam
All the lights in the evening late on the square
No one could wish for any better
Than to be someone from Amsterdam!

And you can't ask for better than that.

Monday, 3 August 2020

Let it hang

It's beautiful out there - and for once I can embrace the sunshine and gorgeousness of midweek weather, as I am on holiday.

I wouldn't normally be up at this hour, of course, but I have a dentist appointment this morning (for an extraction!), which does rather take the edge off it. It was, of course, the second thing - behind getting my hair cut, which I managed the other week - that I have been desperately waiting to get tackled during all this lockdown, so needs must.

Speaking of hair, here's a little something for a Tacky Music Monday dedicated to anyone who has yet to get to their hairdresser...

Wise words.

Have a good week, dear reader.

Sunday, 2 August 2020

I think I'll travel on to Avalon

A more rewarding day spent in the garden today - the weather has been generally sunny, we've moved our new bench out of the "firing line" of the bloody wood-pigeons and their elderberry-fuelled purple shit, shifted some of the pots around, and generally pottered around dead-heading and feeding the plants. With everything in pots, getting things in order and watered is a bit of a task - but we'll need to make sure everything's in the best of health for when we're away.

In keeping with the "Sunday mood", here's some "Sunday music" - a delightful meeting of three great voices, in perfect harmony...


Saturday, 1 August 2020

Don't be stingy I'm a growing girl

Another peek up my back passage [Click to embiggen]

Up and down like a whore's drawers, this weather! One minute it's sunny, the next the sky turns completely black. Hey ho, I've managed to do some pottering regardless, which is something...

...after four whole months in lockdown, this is about as much exercise as I have managed to get, to be honest.

Some people, however, don't care about what people think about their ever-expanding waistline - I'm with Motormouth Maybelle on this one!

Once upon a time
Girl I was just like you
Never let my extra large
Largesse shine through

Hair was brown and nappy
Never had no fun
I hid under a bushel
Which is easier said than done

Then one day my grandma
Who was big and stout
She said you gotta love yourself
From inside out

And just as soon as I learned
How to strut my funky stuff
I found out that the world at large
Can't get enough so

Bring on that pecan pie
Pour some sugar on it
Sugar, don't be shy

Scoop me up a mess
Of that chocolate swirl
Don't be stingy
I'm a growing girl

I offer
big love
With no apology
How can I deny the world
The most of me

I am not afraid
To throw my weight around
Pound by pound by pound
Because I'm

Big, blond and beautiful
There is nothin' 'bout me
That's unsuitable

No one wants a meal
That only offers the least
When girl we're servin' up
The whole damn feast

Slice off a piece
Of that hog head cheese
Then take a look inside
My book of recipes

Now, don't you sniff around
For something fluffy and light
I need a man who brings
A man size appetite

Now, get me some bacon sarnies...