Queen of the Night aria?

Gratuitous - but obligatory - Coq Galoise

And so we have crawled, tortuously, to the end of another thrilling working week...

...but in all the - ahem - excitement, I quite forgot that on Tuesday, our leetle Froggy chums were enjoying their biggest day of celebration, Le Quatorze Juillet (or, as it is better known here, Bastille Day)!

To make up for it, who better to start the weekend party celebrations than one of our revered, dearly departed, Gallic Patron Saints, Régine?

Vive le disco, c'est vendredi!

Régine - Reine de la Nuit

Have a great weekend, dear reader!

J'ai plus d'appétit qu'un Barracuda

Sigh. Here we are again.

The heatwave having subsided, this would be a perfect day to potter in the garden. Unfortunately, back to the office we go...

Never mind, eh? To save ourselves from screaming, let's fix our minds on the fact that there's only this week to go, then it's Gay Xmas!

Meanwhile, on this Tacky Music Monday let's join "France's premier electrician" and his cheesy dancers in a morning exercise routine:

Claude François - Alexandrie Alexandra

I feel better already.

Have a good week, dear reader!

Zut alors!

Soupir. Encore lundi...

Tant pis - aujourd'hui c'est la fête nationale française!

Ok, that's quite enough pretence that I actually speak French - on this Tacky Music Monday, let us instead hand over to the late, great Mlle Annie Cordy to provide the (very odd) wake-up call today, shall we?!

Annie Cordy - Cho Ka Ka O (Chaud Cacao)

Have a good week, dear reader.

Preposterous, vainglorious idiots

France has announced it has failed as a democratic republic and is to return to good old-fashioned monarchical rule.

Following the deposing of prime minister Michel Barnier after just three months, the country has decided to face facts, cut its losses and go back to the golden years of divine sun kings.

Jacques Brun of Brive-la-Gaillarde, washing down a handful of snails with a glass of Beaujolais, said: “Eh, why not? Trump is in, we can see which way le vent souffler.

“It would seem the world returns to preposterous, vainglorious idiots seated upon thrones of gold and attended to by giggling sycophants in wigs, and we did it first and did it best. Time to get a Louis in.

“Unfortunately we rather extinguished the royal line with our typical zeal a couple of hundred years ago, but we’re French, we’ll pick somebody who looks sexy in a crown. I rather fancy Léa Seydoux myself.

“Then we’ll plunge ourselves back into full decadence whether sexual, artistic and gastronomic. It will be a century of rococo excess and powdered, aristocratic deviancy. The whole of Disneyland Paris will not be enough to contain their orgies.

“The rest of the country? We can get fucked, we had our chance. It’s back to peasantry, cholera and an average life expectancy of 35.”

The Daily Mash

Of course.

[The "real" story.]

All that and Slime Dion too...

The Paris Olympics opening ceremony. It poured down.

And, from the bits I saw, it wasn't a patch on ours!

Found wanting?

[click to embiggen]

Madam Arcati and I concluded our "choral triptych" - we saw Faure's Requiem in March, and Verdi's Requiem in June - at the Cadogan Hall last night, with the biggest and most OTT of the lot, William Walton's Belshazzar's Feast.

Famously, the piece requires a huge vocal ensemble (last night's production had two choirs - Epsom Choral Society and the Barnes Choir), and just about every instrument in the orchestral canon. Indeed, the renowned wit and esteemed conductor Sir Thomas Beecham (who was very sniffy about the work as it was about to receive its premiere) said to the young William Walton: "As you'll never hear the thing again, my boy, why not throw in a couple of brass bands?" So he did.

It's impressive, that's for certain, if not exactly my "cup of tea" either. It's based upon one of those dramatic Old Testament stories full of smiting: the Jews are in exile as slaves in Babylon and the tyrant Belshazzar commits sacrilege by taking their sacred vessels for his guests and concubines to use at a lavish feast, bringing damnation upon his head. It includes the original source of the phrase "the writing's on the wall" - "You have been weighed in the balances, and found wanting." Belshazzar's subsequent death and the fall of his empire become the cause of great celebration for the Jews. Noisily.

BBC Singers, BBC Symphony Chorus, BBC Symphony Orchestra, cond. Sir Andrew Davis - Belshazzar's feast: Then sing aloud to God (Finale) [Walton]

It is, of course, another phrase from that original story [later repeated in one of the Psalms] that has become even more famous in popular culture - not least in this eternal classic. I couldn't possibly imagine two more polar opposite pieces of music - but hey, that's the way my mind works!

Boney M - Rivers of Babylon

---

PS

It's France's greatest day of celebration, Le Quatorze Juillet (or Bastille Day)...

...so here's some coq gaulois, for your delectation:

Ooh, la, la!

Derrière un kleenex

Sad news. That most beautiful and uber-cool of chanteuses Mlle Françoise Hardy has ascended the glittering stairway to Fabulon, Gauloise in hand...

A core performer in the so-called yé-yé craze in early 1960s France, her cultural impact was such that Bob Dylan became obsessed, sending love letters, and wrote a poem about her, and Mick Jagger said that she was his "ideal woman".

Over her long career she released almost 30 LPs (the most recent in 2018), modelled for Yves Saint Laurent and Paco Rabanne, represented Monaco at the Eurovision Song Contest, and worked with a diverse range of arists including Serge Gainsburg, Jane Birkin, Air [on the b-side of their smash Sexy Boy], Michel Berger, Iggy Pop and Blur. Remarkable.

Here is a selection of her songs, by way of a tribute:

Françoise Hardy - Mon amie la rose

[as covered by Natacha Atlas]

Françoise Hardy - Tous les garçons et les filles

... and finally, a classic - made famous decades later by Jimmy Somerville:

Françoise Hardy - Comment te dire adieu

RIP, Françoise Madeleine Hardy (17th January 1944 – 11th June 2024)

Coconut milk, anyone?

Sigh.

Back to the grind again - and to add insult to injury, we are due even warmer weather all this week than any single day of my recent two-and-a-half-week holiday...

Never mind, eh? On this Tacky Music Monday, I feel I may have outdone myself (and that is saying something by Tacky Music Monday standards over the years!). How about the combination of a singer who resembles "Renato" of "Renee and Renato" fame reflected in a fairground mirror, with two men dancing in pith helmets and towels, and a grinning bimbo with a weird vertically-pointing braid/updo?!

I'm not making this mindfuck up, you know!

Maya - Lait de coco

Once seen, this can never be unseen.

Have a good week, dear reader...

Et donc, adieu à une icône de style

Sad news - one of the coolest people on the planet, style icon, actress and singer Jane Birkin has departed, in a cloud of Galoise-smoke, no doubt, for Fabulon.

Aptly described by the British ambassador to France as "the most French of British artists", she transcended the waif-like ingenue image that the media had created around her to carve her own niche, with or without the lover with whom she was most associated Serge Gainsbourg. Hermes famously created a best-selling bag named after her, fashion houses tried to ape her style, and she chose her own career path - not many actresses could say they'd worked in the super-cool French New Wave film era with the likes of with Agnès Varda and Jacques Rivette, and appeared in two uber-camp Poirot films (Death on the Nile and Evil Under the Sun).

Musically, she may have been launched into the spotlight thanks to the pseudo-orgasmic Je T’aime … Moi Non Plus, but she sustained a long and varied repertoire, releasing an album with fellow "cult French icon" Etienne Daho as recently as 2021.

Here are three clips of the lady herself - firstly in a collaboration with another véritable trésor national:

Françoise Hardy et Jane Birkin - Comment Te Dire Adieu

From a rather bewitching 2003 album of hers we have in our collection here at Dolores Delargo Towers, Arabesque:

Jane Birkin - Elisa

And a cover of a song originally sung by fellow ex-pat in France, Petula Clark:

Jane Birkin, Les Negresses Vertes - La gadoue

A great loss.

RIP, Jane Mallory Birkin, OBE (14th December 1946 – 16th July 2023)

Party like it's 1978

Zut alors! Our fave Gallic Patron Saint of Sparkly Frocks and Big Hair Dalida would have been 90 years old this week!

She's perfect on any occasion, of course, but for a pick-me-up at the end of another cold, drawn-out and tiring week, there's nothing like an all-wiggling all-posing performance by the grand dame and her safety gay (singular) Bruno Guillain to start the party - and Merci Disco c'est vendredi!

Dalida - Génération 78

Dalida (born Iolanda Cristina Gigliotti, 17th January 1933 – 3rd May 1987)

Have a great weekend, dear reader!

C'est sa vie

Bah, Humbug.

Woke up this morning thinking it was still the middle of the night, it's so dark. As is the wont here in the UK, all that drama of freezing cold and mass transport disruption has handed-over to the usual grey mizzle. Very festive.

To lighten the mood somewhat, how about a genuine "earworm"?

You know you're getting old when you find out that baby-pop pixie-girl Vanessa Paradis [latterly the woman Johnny Depp left to hook up with that gold-digger Amber Heard] is fifty years old today... and this, her biggest hit never fails to get stuck in my brain whever I hear it:

Vanessa Paradis - Joe le Taxi

You're welcome.

Because he has a hair in his hand

Another edifying week at work starts again, and as always I am not ready for it.

C'est la vie - at least on this Tacky Music Monday we have the divine (and dearly missed) Régine to help lift the mood...

Régine - Mon amour a un poil dans la main

Mon amour ne fait jamais rien
Mon amour ne dit jamais rien
Car il a un poil dans la main
Mon amour ne boit jamais rien
Mon amour ne peut jamais rien
Car il a un poil dans la main

Il s'endort quand il a des peines
Et dans ses rêves jamais il ne m'emmène
Des heures, des jours et même des semaines
Et moi j'attends, j'attends qu'il me revienne

Which apparently translates as:

My love never does anything
My love never says anything
Because he has a hair in his hand
My love never drinks anything
My love can never do anything
Because he has a hair in his hand

He falls asleep when he is in trouble
And in his dreams he never takes me
Hours, days and even weeks
And I wait, I wait for him to come back to me

Bizarre.

Have a good week, dear reader. Don't get sunstroke!

Her jewellery, her chinchillas

It may be the May Day Bank Holiday, but...

...it's still a Tacky Music Monday! And, with the sad loss yesterday of one of our cherished Patron Saints Regine, who better than she to start the week off in a fitting manner - complete with safety gays, bien sûr?!!

Regine - La Grande Zoa [Mardi Gras Story, 1969]

Quand vient l'mardi, la grande Zoa
Met ses bijoux, ses chinchillas
Et puis à minuit, la grande Zoa
Autour du cou s'met un boa

Y en a qui marmonnent
Que la grande Zoa
Ce serait un homme
On dit ça!

Which translates as:

When Tuesday comes, the Great Zoa
Puts on her jewellery, her chinchillas
And then at midnight, the Great Zoa
Throws a boa around her neck

There are those who whisper
That the Great Zoa
Appears to be a man
People say that!

Have a good week, dear reader...

[I was torn between two video versions of this song - so here's the other (live) version for your delectation, in which the "Queen of the Night"'s safety gays get even camper!]

Where do they go, the men who leave your flat, to buy some cigarettes, and never do come back?

click to embiggen

I saw this ad for a Sylvie Vartan Barbie doll, and thought "I must have that!"

Here on this Tacky Music Monday, dear reader, is a very good reason why it's been added to my list [after these, of course!]...

Sylvie Vartan - Last Tango [Monte Carlo Show, 1982]

Have a good week.

[PS In case anyone's forgotten, the reason I'm not in my usual "Grumpy Monday" mood is beacuse I have a day off on annual leave today. YAY!!]

Je vis comme si j'étais en vacances

Shit. After a fantabulosa fortnight - a week in the welcome sunshine of Spain, followed by a week just monging about to recover, topped off with "the gathering of the clans" on Saturday (the excuse being a rather late celebration of the Madam's birthday) - I am not ready for the return to the grimness of work!

Hey ho.

Our original premise of seeking out pubs with function rooms, on our "pub crawl" a few weeks ago, was to find one that would provide "our gang" with a replacement venue for our regular "film club evenings" now that our previous venue the Hoop and Grapes in Farringdon remains closed "for refurbishment". The Traitors Gate opposite the Tower of London provided everything we would want to that end and more - but rather than strictly adhering to our usual formula of studiously [ahem!] watching full-length movies, Madam Arcati decided he wanted music and general chit-chat more befitting of a birthday party. He'd already filled his phone with a playlist of suitable choons, so I grabbed a few random "music-oriented" DVDs to take along as well - and of course, Our Gallic Patron Saint Dalida was among them!

She went down very well...

On this Tacky Music Monday, as I crash and burn catching-up with all the pedestrian crud that work will inevitably bring, I can think of no better diversion than this beloved classic from the late grande dame herself!

Dalida - Monday, Tuesday

Moi je vis d'amour et de danse
Je vis comme si j'étais en vacances
Je vis comme si j'étais éternelle
Comme si les nouvelles étaient sans problèmes

Moi je vis d'amour et de rire
Je vis comme si y avait rien à dire
J'ai tout le temps d'écrire mes mémoires
D'écrire mon histoire à l'encre bleue

Laissez-moi danser, laissez-moi
Laissez-moi danser chanter en liberté tout l'été
Laissez-moi danser [Monday], laissez-moi [Tuesday]
Aller jusqu'au bout du rêve!

Which translates as:

Me I see life in love and dance
I live like I'm on vacation
I live like I'm eternal
As if the news were without problems

I live on love and laughter
I live like there's nothing to say
I have all the time to write my memoirs
To write my story in blue ink

Let me dance, let me
Let me dance, sing and be free all summer
Let me dance [Monday] let me [Tuesday]
Go to the end of my dreams

The end of my dreams, indeed.

Have a good week, dear reader. I won't.

Breathless

RIP Jean-Paul Belmondo, icon of the French "New Wave" (9th April 1933 – 6th September 2021)

[click any photo to embiggen]

Coq Galoise, encore

Gratuitous photo of French totty, bien sûr.

Across the channel, our leetle Froggy chums are having a party - for today is their biggest day of celebration, Le Quatorze Juillet (or, as it is better known here, Bastille Day!

To mark the occasion, shall we dance..?

Cassita - La Foule

Te mets en joie pour la journée

Just because we heard someone else singing this song on the radio last night, I simply had to revisit an old favourite - by far the best version of La Carioca ever!

As I said back in 2010, when I originally posted it: "I can guarantee that once this gets into your head you will find it very hard to stop singing it all day..."

Sais tu danser la carioca?
C'n'est pas un fox trot
Ou une polka
C'n'est vraiment pas
Très compliqué
Pour la comprendre
Suis bien mes pas

C'n'est pas un tango
Ou un cha cha
Encore moins
Une bossa nova
Quand t'as goûté
A cette danse là
Tu ne peux
Plus faire que ça

Youpi!
Dansons la carioca
C'est bien
Faisez tous comme moi
Youpi
Avec la carioca
Tant pis s'il faut dire
Aux autres danses
"Au revoir"

Maint'nant qu'tu danses
La carioca
Ça tu t'en fiches bien
De la polka
Tu n'en veux plus
De la rumba, du houla hop
Et du cha cha

Tous les matins
Dès le lever
La carioca
Te fais bouger
Et quand tu danses
Chaque petit pas
Te mets en joie
Pour la journée

Youpi!
Dansons la carioca
C'est bien
Faisez tous comme moi
Oh oui! Youpi
Dansons la carioca
Tant pis s'il faut dire
A tout le monde
"Au revoir"

Indeed.

Retour aux années quatre-vingt!

Among another miscellany of fellow celebrants, including Cecil Beaton, "professional weirdo" Faye Dunaway (who is 80), Richard Briers, Bebe Daniels, Warren Mitchell, Steven Soderbergh, Jack Jones, Sir Trevor Nunn, Pierre Loti, Emily Watson, Billie Jo Spears, Yukio Mishima, Nina Ricci, Mark Antony, Dave Grohl and - erm - LL Cool J, it's the 65th birthday today of Étienne Daho, one of France's most popular (and coolest) singers of recent years - he was even immortalised by Pierre et Gilles (with a parrot), as above!

By way of celebration, let's let the man himself whisk us away to his heyday (and mine), the 1980s...

Etienne Daho - Tombé pour la France

Etienne Daho - Week end à Rome

Reminder to self: must dig out that pirate shirt, sixteen-pleat two-tone pegged trousers and pixie boots...

Bonne anniversaire, Étienne Daho (born 14th January 1956)

Une bourde monumentale

Rika or Régine?

Très embarrassant!

This is what happens when media outlets employ people who get all their information from Tw*tter instead of proper journalists. Earlier this week, French news channel BFMTV reported on the death of the iconic Israeli-French singer Rika Zaraï at the age of 82 - but featured images of (our Patron Saint) the very-much-still-alive Régine instead!

Both ladies are, of course, house favourites here at Dolores Delargo Towers, so by way of a tribute - first up, something from the late, great Rika:

Rika Zaraï - Oriental Hava Naguila (remix)

And, on the Grande Dame Régine's 91st birthday, a classic:

Régine - J'ai toujours porté bonheur aux hommes

RIP Rika Zaraï (19th February 1938 – 23rd December 2020) [More Rika]

Bonne anniversaire, Régine Zylberberg (born 26th December 1929)! [More Régine]