Monday, 14 June 2021

Don't thumb your nose, but take a tip from mine

Me when the alarm goes off. Obviously.

Oh, bollocks! Another fabulous - and really hot - weekend, pleasantly pottering in the garden and enjoying the scents of jasmine, roses and pinks, is over with a jolt. Back to the grind...

Not all is lost, however. Sharing a birthday with another odd assortment, including Che Guevara, Paul O'Grady, Steffi Graf, Boy George (60 today), Harriet Beecher Stowe, Archbishop of Monmouth Rowan Williams, Rod Argent, Lang Lang, Burl Ives, Antony Sher, Julie Felix, Sam Wanamaker, Alan Carr, Dorothy McGuire, Siobhán Donaghy of the Sugababes, and - erm - Trump... would have been the multi-talented composer, songwriter and jazz pianist Cy Coleman's birthday today [read my tribute on what would have been his 80th way back in 2009]. Famed for his standards such as Witchcraft, Nobody Does It Like Me, It's Not Where You Start (It's Where You Finish), The Best Is Yet to Come and many more, and (of course) his magnum opus (with lyricist Dorothy Fields) the musical Sweet Charity, he also wrote (with Carolyn Leigh) the ill-fated musical Wildcat for Lucille Ball. It sank without trace, but, on this Tacky Music Monday, to cheer us all up a bit, here's the choon from it that did endure - and a house favorite here at Dolores Delargo Towers to perform it for us!

Hey look me over, lend me an ear
Fresh out of clover, mortgage up to here
Don't pass the plate folks, don't pass the cup
I figure whenever you're down and out, the only way is up
And I'll be up like a rosebud high on the vine
Don't thumb your nose, but take a tip from mine
I'm a little bit short of the elbow room, so let me get me some
And look out world, here I come

Hey look me over, lend me an ear
Fresh out of clover, mortgage up to here
Don't pass the plate folks, don't pass the cup
I figure whenever you're down and out, the only way is up
And I'll be up like a rosebud high on the vine
Don't thumb your nose, but take a tip from mine
I'm a little bit short of the elbow room, so let me get me some
And look out world, here I come!

Nobody in the world was ever without a prayer
How can you win the world if nobody knows you're there?

Kid, when you need the crowd, the tickets are hard to sell
Still, you can lead the crowd if you can get up and yell

Hey look me over, lend me an ear
Fresh out of clover, mortgage up to here
I'm a little bit short of the elbow room, so let me get me some
And look out world, here me shout world
And look out world, here I come!

Have a good week, dear reader. I'll be taking plenty of fag breaks if the weather continues to be like this - and even if you don't smoke, I'd suggest you do too!

Sunday, 13 June 2021

Knowing me, knowing you?

Apropos of nothing at all, I was rather taken by the uber-sexy Chris Hemsworth shifting the - ahem - weight about for our delectation...

On a glorious sunny day, what better accompaniment could there be than this dreamy number - courtesy of the faboo Soft Tempo Lounge?

[Original film: Skaterdater (1965)]

Saturday, 12 June 2021


Dame Prue Leith, Sir Jonathan Pryce, Dame Arlene Phillips (of "Hot Gossip" choreography fame), and Our Patron Saint of Shout, Lulu (Kennedy-Cairns) CBE"

Joining them among the 1,129 awardees in HM The Queen’s Birthday Honours today are - CBE: tennis pundit Sue Barker, TV's Crimewatch host Nick Ross and the legendary Rick Wakeman; OBE: Skin (of Skunk Anansie), Julian Lloyd Webber and poet Lemn Sissay; and MBE: Englebert Humperdinck, trumpeter Jess Gillam, BBC Wales "easy listening" show host Beverley Humphreys and former Radios 1 and 2 stalwart Simon Mayo...

...and, last but not least, house fave here at Dolores Delargo Towers Alison Moyet MBE!

Congratulations, all.


Today also happens to be World Gin Day!

Clink, clink, dear reader...

Friday, 11 June 2021

People getting loose y'all, getting down on the roof


This is a week I'll be very glad to see the back of - nothing's quite as frustrating as dealing with work bollocks in the living-room all day while just yards away, the sunny garden and all its associated pottering jobs beckons...

To welcome the prospect of another hot weekend afoot, what better than a little something that was in the UK charts this week - gulp! - 44 years ago?!

It's Legs & Co at their (ahem!) finest, too - Thank Disco It's Friday!

Have a great weekend, dear reader!

Thursday, 10 June 2021

You! You! You!

Our lovely Rosa "Veilchenblau" that I took as a cutting - read more here - is starting to put on a splendid show in the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers!

There must have been something in the water one hundred and thirty years ago this week - for on consecutive days, two of the finest songwriters of the Great American Songbook were born. Yesterday, it was the incomparable Cole Porter - creator of myriad classics including Begin the Beguine, You're the Top, I Get a Kick Out of You, Easy to Love, I've Got You Under My Skin, Let's Do It (Let's Fall In Love), In the Still of the Night, Too Darn Hot... and this one, memorably performed as a love duet between Kevin Kline and sex-god John Barrowman in the Porter biopic De-Lovely:

Today's birthday boy may not be as well remembered, but among Al Dubin's remarkable catalogue are standards such as I Only Have Eyes for You, Keep Young and Beautiful, Lullaby of Broadway, Tiptoe Through The Tulips, We're In the Money, September in the Rain, Lulu's Back in Town... and, from his triumphal musical [with Harry Warren] 42nd Street, this classic by Miss Bebe Daniels and her safety gays:


Wednesday, 9 June 2021

A Word from our Sponsors...

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Tuesday, 8 June 2021

Every now and then I fall apart

“I’ve no intention of retiring! Look at the wonderful Sir Tom Jones. He’s got 10 years on me, his voice is awesome, and he’s still doing it. I like what I do."

We like what she does, too.

Many happy returns to the faboo Miss Bonnie Tyler - Welsh icon and doyenne of the dramatic power-ballad - who blows out seventy candles on her cake today!

I have played the piss-take "literal" version of her magnum opus many, many times before - not least in my tribute to the maestro behind it Jim Steinman on his death in April, and in my post celebrating "Our Gaynor"'s 65th - so I thought why not, for the first time, have the original..?

Bonnie Tyler (born Gaynor Hopkins, 8th June 1951)

Monday, 7 June 2021

Sí, señor, aqui está, la movida

Working from home does tend to put a strain on one's back.

Where do these bloody weekends go?!

I've hardly had time to adjust to "me time", and suddenly... work again. Groan.

Never mind, eh? With the current spell of warm weather (cloudy or otherwise), our thoughts inevitably turn to Spain - but, as we're currently unable to go there, or indeed anywhere at the moment, on this Tacky Music Monday let's wallow in a tribute (of sorts) to its joys [courtesy of a French band, performing in front of a ghastly backdrop and looking as if they had never even been to the place they're singing about]...

Almost woke me up.

Have a good week, dear reader...

Sunday, 6 June 2021

Hold on a minute...

Yesterday's Wandavision-binge-watch-party at John-John's was indeed a mammoth session - we started the series at about 2pm, and even after watching all nine episodes the party continued till late - I ended up getting home by taxi at around 2am, and was still "fired up" so didn't actually get to bed till 4am...

It's been a bit of a slow day. However, I did finally get around to re-potting two of our old Salvia Amistad that were looking very sorry for themselves, and one of them is now paired in a trough with the brand new S. verticillata we brought back from our visit to Essex so the day wasn't exactly wasted.

My pottering was been accompanied, as always, by the mellow tones of BBC Radio 2, and the fact that today would have been 85th birthday today of Mr Levi Stubbs - the lead singer of The Four Tops for almost fifty years - gives me a perfect excuse to feature a "Sunday music" classic:


Levi Stubbs (born Levi Stubbles, 6th June 1936 – 17th October 2008)

Saturday, 5 June 2021

'Scuse I...

...just getting myself ready for John-John's all-day party!

Friday, 4 June 2021

Hey now, hey now, hear what I say now

This may only have been a short working week, but by heavens - it has dragged!

I'm off to our friend John-John's place tomorrow [on what may well be another scorcher of a day, weather-wise] for a marathon telly session of Wandavision [although I am sure there'll be a lot of sitting-in-the-sunshine-with-a-fag-and-a-cider in between!], but meanwhile - here's a simply faboo kitschy camp number to ease our passage to the end of the week...

Thank Disco Venga It's Friday!

Have a fantabulosa weekend, dear reader...

Thursday, 3 June 2021

Gawd bless yer, Ma'am!

The Queen is giving Britons an extra bank holiday, five grams of cocaine and a big cake each for her Platinum Jubilee next year. And that’s just to start with:

All bands to reform
Do you dream of seeing the The Jam back together, playing a blistering set? Oasis reunited? The Smiths’ original line-up on stage? That’s happening, by Royal decree, to prove that a career rebelling against the establishment is nothing compared to the threat of beheading.

Smoking in pubs
For one glorious weekend next summer smoking in pubs will be entirely legal again, just as it was for most of ER’s reign. Have a fag at the bar and another on the go at the urinals, and remember how it was when Britain was Great.

A Coronation Street and EastEnders crossover
Mick Carter leaves Walford for a break and arrives in Weatherfield. Meanwhile Shona Platt rocks up at the Queen Vic. Yes, it’s a full summer crossover including affairs, murders, and a pregnancy where the father could be from either soap. Because the people wanted it and the Queen says.

Meghan pranked
The Duchess of Sussex will spend the next 12 months making an earnest, powerful Netflix documentary about self-empowerment – only to learn that the whole thing was a Palace set-up. Everyone involved was an actor, they’ve all been laughing at her and she looks a right twat.

A drug collection
For the Silver Jubilee it was Party Sevens. For the Golden Jubilee it was white cider. For her Platinum Jubilee, in addition to five grams of coke our monarch is also bestowing upon her subjects a quarter of weed, three Es and a tab of vintage acid to be dropped at 7pm, an hour before the fireworks.

A cabinet minister of your choice executed
The Royals love a good execution and it’s been too damn long. So, chosen by a Saturday night BBC show and weekly phone-in, one of Her Majesty’s Government will be executed at her pleasure live from the top of Buckingham Palace before cheering, bloodthirsty crowds.

The Daily Mash

Of course.

[The "real" story]

Wednesday, 2 June 2021

I fell asleep amid the flowers

Another photo from Beth Chatto's Gardens last weekend - click to embiggen

Having missed a Tacky Music Monday as we were travelling home from Essex on Bank Holiday Monday, and since this continuing hot weather [albeit clouded-over this afternoon, after a sunny morning] lends itself to a little "light music interlude", let's combine the two things quite neatly, shall we - with this remarkable number?

Of course, you young whipper-snappers out there will have immediately recognised this version, which was a hit in the UK twenty years ago this week...

Either version - I love it!

Tuesday, 1 June 2021

Don't be that way

click to embiggen

Groan. A beautiful, hot and sunny long weekend is over, and bump! Back to reality...

We had a faboo time visiting the boys in Essex, and the treat of all treats was in store - as they took us to the internationally-renowned Beth Chatto Gardens on Saturday! Created by plantswoman Beth Chatto in 1960 from the gravel soil and bogs of the disused fruit farm belonging to her husband, botanist Andrew Chatto, the garden follows her innovative ethos of "right plant, right place", and encompasses a range or habitats from her famous (never watered!) gravel garden, to woodland, wetland, scree [as in the photo above, with just one ugly specimen spoiling the picture - me] and herbaceous planting - and it is utterly splendiferous! We thoroughly enjoyed it.

And, as usual, we trawled the garden centres all around the area and came back with bags full of new plants for the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers...

But what did we miss while we were away..?

The news was much the same old, same old - COVID, that Nazi dictator in Belarus mouthing-off, banner headlines and gratuitous swimsuit shots in the tabloids just because there was actually sunshine on a Bank Holiday weekend, Denmark's "spy ring" was exposed... and Heinz Tomato Ketchup is going to be made in Britain again! Oh, and apparently Prince Harry's new job title means "penis" in Japanese.

We missed the late, great national treasure Dame Thora Hird's 110th anniversary, the legendary Edna Doré's centenary and the sadly-missed Eurovision host Katie Boyle's 95th, the 90th birthday of Baby Doll star and sex symbol Carroll Baker [still with us!], as well as the 60th birthdays of impressionist Harry Enfield and the gorgeous Roland Gift of Fine Young Cannibals, and Wicked star Idina Menzel's 50th.

Over the weekend, we mainly listened to/watched YouTube videos of camp pop (as is our wont) such as Kylie, Fangoria, Erasure and Steps, and 90s dance music, which was jolly. However, today marks the centenary of the birth of one Nelson Smock Riddle Jr., so I think we should have a selection of more sophisticated music from the great man's repertoire to greet our return to work. Like these:

How life should be.

Reminder to self: Must. Win. Euromillions Lottery. Tonight.