Take my tears and that's not nearly all

"What we're gonna do right here is go back, way back, back into time."*

Yes, folks, another timeslip moment beckons - and off we hurtle yet again through the mists of time four decades to the year I turned eighteen...

In September 1981 - apart from the strange sensation that for the first time I did not have to go back to school - the news was full of frothing headlines about the arrival of the "Women's Peace Camp" at Greenham Common (proposed site of a US Cruise Missile base) and about the "decimalisation" of petrol and diesel (now to be sold by the litre, not the gallon). Also in the headlines: the continued rise of the Social Democratic Party (with the defection from Labour of the sitting Islington MP) and its alliance with the Liberals (which prompted the notorious speech by their leader David Steel: "go back to your constituencies and prepare for government"; it never happened, as Maggie Thatcher's Tory party remained in place for the whole decade), the salvage of gold ingots worth £40 million from the wreck of HMS Edinburgh off Norway, and the massive free concert in New York's Central Park given by Simon and Garfunkel; in the ascendant were Cecil Parkinson (who became chairman of the Conservative Party), and Belize (which gained independence from the UK); the first Boeing 767 aeroplane was "born", but we bade a sad farewell to "Young Mr Grace" from Are You Being Served? Harold Bennett. In our cinemas: An American Werewolf in London; The French Lieutenant's Woman; Escape to Victory. On telly: the debuts of Only Fools and Horses, Danger Mouse, Bullseye and Postman Pat.

And in our charts this week four decades ago? Adam and the Ant's Prince Charming had just crashed in at #2, destined to dominate our consciousness for months to come, mainly thanks to its magnificently camp video [which I realise to my surprise I have never featured on this blog before; and, even more surprisingly, there's only a lo-res version on YouTube]:

Adam & the Ants - Prince Charming

All present and correct was some fab stuff from The Human League, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, Gary Numan, UB40 and the Rolling Stones, and also - ahem - Cliff Richard, ELO and Aneka's bloody Japanese Boy.

But holding onto the top slot for a second (and final) week was one of my all-time favourite songs - and the stirring of my foray into the world of hair-dye, eyeliner, diamanté, pegged trousers and pointy shoes had begun...

Soft Cell - Tainted Love

40 years on, and this choon is still a mainstay of all our parties [although the dancing to it is nowadays much creakier], and every time I hear it I still do that "wrists together" action Marc did on Top of the Pops.

Time flies when you're having fun...

[* The "back, back into time" quote and clip above - as used by Johnny Walker in the intro to his Sounds of the Seventies show on BBC Radio 2 - is an extract from Troglodyte (Cave Man) by The Jimmy Castor Bunch.]

I see innocence shining through

Timeslip moment again...

Our trusty TARDIS has dumped us into the inaugural year of a brand-new exciting decade! It's 1980 - the year of the Mount St. Helens eruption, The Empire Strikes Back, Robin Cousins, the Iranian Embassy siege (and the dramatic televised SAS rescue), Alton Towers, the eradication of smallpox, an independent Zimbabwe and the rise of Robert Mugabe, Greenham Common, the boycott of the Olympics in Moscow, Yes Minister, the so-called "Dingo Baby" case, Andrei Sakharov, Pac-Man, the St Paul's riot in Bristol, Hi-de-Hi, civil war in El Salvador, and the murder of John Lennon; the births of Chelsea Clinton, Christina Aguilera, Venus Williams, Katherine Jenkins, Ryan Gosling, the MRI whole body scanner, CNN, the Audi Quattro and - erm - Kim Kardashian; and the deaths of Cecil Beaton, Alfred Hitchcock, Jimmy Durante, Peter Sellers, Tamara de Lempicka, Marshal Josip Tito, Ian Curtis, Yootha Joyce, Steve McQueen, and the pre-decimal sixpence coin.

In the news in October thirty-eight years ago: Margaret Thatcher delivered her famous "The lady's not for turning" speech, Polish trade union Solidarity was formally recognised by the country's government, prisoners in the Maze prison in Northern Ireland started a hunger strike that lasted till December, "Right to Buy" (for council tenants) was launched, Jim Callaghan resigned as Labour Party Leader, HM The Queen visited the Vatican (the first monarch to do so), and Greece rejoined NATO; in the ascendant were Reza Pahlavi (who proclaimed himself successor to the Peacock Throne after the death of his father the Shah of Iran), and the Austin Mini Metro (launched by British Leyland as the successor to the Mini); but we bade a sad farewell to "national treasure" Hattie Jacques. In our cinemas: The Blues Brothers; Close Encounters of the Third Kind (special edition); Breaker Morant. On telly: The Amazing Adventures of Morph, Metal Mickey, and the last ever episode of The Onedin Line.

But what was in the charts this week in October 1980? Top of the tree was the all-conquering "MegaBabs" Barbra Streisand with Woman in Love, which had just knocked The Police Don't Stand So Close To Me off its perch after four weks. Also in the running were Ottawan, Status Quo, Madness, Matchbox, Odyssey, The Nolans, George Benson and a really weird piece of ambient/relaxation/lift music featuring real birdsong called Et les oiseaux chantaient [to this day nobody will ever admit to buying this, but it did get into the Top 5]. However, lurking outside this fairly pedestrian Top Ten, the future was looming - in the form of Adam and the Ants [soon to dominate the UK charts for several years in the early 80s]!

Adam & the Ants - Dog Eat Dog

Thirty-eight years? Oh, heavens...

Brush me, Daddy-o!

Timeslip moment again...

This time around, we've been unceremoniously dumped back thirty-six years - to the dawning of my favourite decade, the Eighties...

The news in November 1980 had an eerily familiar feel, as a Democratic US Presidential candidate (this time Jimmy Carter) accused his opponent of being "a dangerous right-wing radical", yet was trounced by his Republican opponent (Ronald Reagan), and the world shuddered. Also in the news: NASA space probe Voyager I sent back high definition shots from its orbit of Saturn; the bloody civil war in El Salvador shocked the world; the IRA hunger strike in the Maze Prison was underway; two (one not fatal) attacks on women were attributed to the Yorkshire Ripper; in the ascendant were Solidarity in Poland, Michael Foot (elected Leader of the Labour Party) and Reza Pahlavi (who became Shah-in-waiting of Iran, despite that country's abolition of the title); but MG cars ceased production in the UK after 56 years. In our cinemas: Close Encounters of the Third Kind, The Blues Brothers and Breaker Morant. On telly: Juliet Bravo (the first series, with Anna Carteret); the launch of the long-running TV review programme Did You See...? (with Ludovic Kennedy); and Shoestring (starring Trevor Eve), in its final series.

In our Charts this week in 1980: Megababs was at #1 with Woman in Love, but Blondie's The Tide is High had just made its début and was about to topple her. Also present and correct were Status Quo, Bad Manners, Matchbox, Odyssey, David Bowie, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark and Ottowan - and this one!

Here [once again, but I make no excuses for playing it on Mr Goddard's birthday!] is Adam and the Ants with Dog Eat Dog:

Adam and the Ants - Dog Eat Dog

Ah, memories.

Many happy returns, Adam Ant (born Stuart Leslie Goddard, 3rd November 1954)!

You may not like the things we do; only idiots ignore the truth

There was no Goody Two Shoes, no Prince Charming, no Stand and Deliver. I sincerely hope no-one turned up hoping this was going to be a "Greatest Hits" concert...

Colleagues in the council and I were thrilled to land tickets for last night's final (of four at Islington Assembly Hall) performance by one of the greatest survivors of the Punk and post-Punk eras that made the cusp of the 1970s to the 1980s so exciting, none other than Adam Ant!



This was indeed a concert for the die-hard fans of the former Stuart Goddard, as he and his fantastic new band performed - as promised - the Ants' seminal (and pre-fame'n'fortune) album Dirk Wears White Sox in its entirety. Just as raw, and just as complex and in-yer-face as it ever was when it was released thirty-five years ago (gulp!).

As "Musky03" at Aural Sculptors (one of those very die-hards) put it:

I can't believe that it was all reproduced so well. These songs can be best described as quirky, but the band did a magnificent job on it, especially with the falsetto harmonies that feature frequently across the album... Nine Plan Failed and The Day I Met God were clear highlights, as was Zerox.

Part of the show was given over to acoustic performances of S.E.X. and Picasso (Visita El Planeta De Los Simios). A nod was given to the direction that the Ants took after Malcolm McLaren took the first band when Adam played Kings of the Wild Frontier and Dog Eat Dog. Aside from that only a cover of Dave Berry's Strange Effect and [Vampires] took the set beyond the 1970's Ants. This was manna from heaven... a perfect 1979 time capsule and yet sounding completely contemporary.

And I couldn't agree more!


[That bloody light blinded us for most of the evening]

This was a bizarre, noisy and utterly inspiring evening of rock musicianship at its very best. Accolades must go to the "backing line-up" - guitarists Tom Edwards, Will Crewdson and (original Ant) Leigh Gorman, Joe Holweger on bass, and the two that really captured the "original" Ants sound, drummers Andy Woodard and (the brilliantly be-wigged) Jola.

But it was, of course, the theatrical and bizarre antics and vocal stylings of the UK's favourite pin-up of the early 80s - he's now a bit (ahem) bigger, and, as The Times described him, reminiscent of "a superannuated version of Captain Jack Sparrow"; but he is sixty years old after all! - that made the evening so very, very special indeed.

Here's the live version from the Islington concert of the classic Kings of the Wild Frontier:

Adam Ant at Islington Assembly Hall Kings of the Wild Frontier

One of the mainstays of the Dirk Wears White Sox album, Tabletalk (complete with its very odd video):

Adam and the Ants - Tabletalk

And, just because I like to reminisce about those heady days when I first grew to adore Mr Ant and his boys, here's their first chart hit from 1981 - Dog Eat Dog:

Adam and the Ants - Dog Eat Dog [TOTP]

You may not like the things we do
Only idiots ignore the truth

It's easy to lay down and hide
Where's the warrior without his pride?

We're gonna move real good
We're gonna dress so fine
It's dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog
Leapfrog the dog
And brush me, daddy-o

It's easy to lay down and hide
Where's the warrior without his pride?

You may not like the things we say
What's the difference, anyway?

We're gonna move real good
We're gonna dress so fine
It's dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog eat dog
Leapfrog the dog
And brush me daddy-o

It makes me proud, so proud of you
I see innocence shining through

Adam Ant (born Stuart Leslie Goddard, 3rd November 1954)

A rather fab interview with Mr Ant in one of Islington's local papers, the Ham and High.

No one's gonna tell me what's wrong or what's right

Timeslip moment again...

Let us take a little trip back to another hot summer (as I recall, we were dancing under the sprinklers on the cricket pitch to keep cool!) - it's 1982, and the gorgeous Mr Adam Ant was simultaneously at the top of the charts and at the top of my teenage wank fantasies...

Where did those thirty years go?

Adam Ant - Goody Two Shoes

We're all older, and madder, like Mr Ant himself, I suppose...

Adam Ant official website

I spend my cash on looking flash

I sat an exam this morning - the Chartered Institute of Purchasing and Supply, level 3 if you need to know - and I feel I need some cheering up after that! [I'm too old and too bloody cynical to be a student...]

And this is just the thing. Thirty years ago a certain gorgeous man by the name of Adam (and his Ants) ruled our world - and here is what they were ruling with this week...

Adam and the Ants - Stand and Deliver

Stand and Deliver indeed! I remember it well - their album Kings of the Wild Frontier was hardly off my Dansette.

Oh, memories of being a teenager again...

Whatever happened to Paul Burnett?

The Xmas chart has been announced for 2010, and once more I find a load of non-entities I have never heard of (or worse, never want to hear again in my life - bloody Rihanna or Black-Eyed Peas, for example) occupy the top slots. Even the Take That song is dull. And where is Kylie?



As you may already know, dear reader, 1981 was a cherished year in my developing adulthood. This was the year I left school, took up smoking and New Romanticism (in no particular order), and fell in love with Brideshead Revisited, Princess Diana and Adam Ant - and (in my memory at least) this was one of the best for music, ever!

Inevitably however, when you come to take a closer look (at the charts; the records that actually sold any kind of quantity) the picture is perhaps not quite so clear-cut. For every Special AKA, there was a Nolans. Kate Bush was big news, but so was Aneka's Japanese Boy. Spandau Ballet, Visage and Ultravox all arrived with a bang - but this was also Shakin' Stevens' best year. Soft Cell broke new ground with Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret, yet Phil Collins and ELO out-sold them in the album charts by a huge margin. A truly eclectic mixture of styles flooded the market - from Ska to Heavy Metal to Rock-a-billy to Stars on 45!

Needless to say, the charts were our Gods. I listened avidly to Paul Burnett on Radio 1 every Tuesday lunchtime (when the Top 40 used to be announced), marking every hit into a notebook, and even grading them "good", "excellent" or "unbearable" - it was an obsession. I bought every single in the "excellent" category (and many of the "good" ones too). So I now have boxes of 7-inch vinyl, all mainly acquired in this era.

Of particular interest to the chart-o-phile was the Xmas chart. Because they were not compiled over the holidays (and whatever was in the higher echelons of the chart would rule the airwaves for the whole of that period) it was vital that at least some favourites just HAD to be in there!

So let us wallow in the nostalgia of this very week in 1981, as the Xmas countdown has been announced...

In a December chart that included Soft Cell's Bedsitter, Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses, My Own Way by Duran Duran, I Could Be Lucky by Altered Images, Get Down On It by Kool and the Gang and the magnificent Wild is the Wind by David Bowie, there had to be some winners and losers I suppose. Inevitably there is some shit by Cliff Richard, and a completely forgotten couple of numbers by Godley and Creme and Status Quo, but nevertheless quite a few enduring favourites do appear. Enjoy!

1 Don't You Want Me - HUMAN LEAGUE

The Human League - Don't You Want Me

2 Daddy's Home - CLIFF RICHARD [I simply cannot bring myself to post this one, sorry any Cliff fans out there.]

3 One of Us - ABBA

Abba - One Of Us

4 Ant Rap - ADAM AND THE ANTS

Adam and the Ants - Ant Rap

5 The Land of Make Believe - BUCKS FIZZ

Bucks Fizz - Land Of Make Believe

6 It Must Be Love - MADNESS

Madness - It Must Be Love

7 Wedding Bells - GODLEY AND CREME

Godley & Creme - Wedding Bells

8 Rock 'n' Roll - STATUS QUO

Status Quo - Rock 'n Roll

9 Mirror Mirror (Mon Amour) - DOLLAR

Dollar - Mirror Mirror

10 I'll Find My Way Home - JON AND VANGELIS

Jon & Vangelis - I'll Find My Way Home

Ah, memories...

Marco, Merrick, Terry Lee, Garry Tibbs and yours truly

So tired of anarchists looking at me
Don't need their credibility.

Destroy
they say
Defy! Condemn!
As long as you don't destroy them.

With twenty years of drugs and drink
I thought the time had come to think
About standing up and saying that
It's a tragedy and such old hat.

Not a great day for a boy with an online passion for trivia and tackiness...

Firstly, our internet (and TV) went down again this morning, thanks to the gnomes at Virgin Media. It was still down when I got in this evening (after trying to avoid the Tube strike rush-hour mania by attending a new LGBT reading group in Islington Library). After a few re-boots it is (obviously) at last back again...

I went on to the web in work, and found that some bizarre individual, apparently masquerading as someone else, had decided his way of getting his rocks off was to post multiple videos as a blog comment on my MySpace profile - all of them a repetition of a news item about someone on Facebook who expressed their wish that all gay people were dead. Charmed, I'm sure. Thus I was not really in the mood today to do any more except block the cunt and log off again.

However, now that I seem to have lanced that particularly vile carbuncle, we at Dolores Delargo Towers feel the need to pay due homage to two of our icons, who happen to share a birthday today - the divine Adam Ant and the stupendous Scottish belter Lulu. Did they ever work together? Of course they did...

Adam & the Ants - Ant Rap