Saturday 6 September 2008

For many years this land was the turnip of Europe



We went to see possibly the noisiest, most hilarious, campest musical in the West End last night - Eurobeat: Almost Eurovision.

As great fans of the annual Euro-Kitsch fest - in the immortal words of Sir Terry Wogan "the ideal opportunity to have a jolly good sneer at Johnny Foreigner and throw things at the telly" - it was inevitable that this just had to be in the social diary.

The evening began at "The Most Homosexual Place On Earth" (Dress Circle music shop), whose lovely management not only gave us copious amounts of free bubbly to get us in the mood, but also Eurobeat goody bags. Armed with a souvenir brochure, a clacker and a flashing horn, it was off to the show!

Hosted by Les Dennis ("Sergei") and Mel Giedroyc ("Boyka"), we were treated to ten of the cheesiest acts in Europe from which were had to vote by text message. And what a selection!!
  • Italy - Vesuvia Versace - leggy bird and bad rappers
  • Poland - Toomas Jerker & the Hard Pole Dancers - queens dancing in suits who then strip off
  • Iceland - Gert Grollmersdetter - Bjork looky-likey with weird dance routine
  • UK - Reyne & Shiner - hilariously bad, smiley boy-girl combo
  • Hungary - The Molnar Sisters - folk costumed trio singing about chickens (my personal fave!)
  • Russia - KGBoyz - the best/worst boyband ever!
  • Ireland - Ronan Corr - a singer taking himself way too seriously
  • Greece - Persephone - if you've never seen Nana Mouskouri strip, well...
  • Germany - Nepotism - strangely familiar electronic arthouse mime act
  • Sweden - Avla - indeed, the same old song


With every new crap performance we were wetting ourselves with laughter! Such an accurate representation of everything we love and hate about Eurovision, and superbly done!

We all cast our votes, then in the second half of the show came the judging from across the countries of Europe. But first, our local host Boyka "treated" us to one of the best songs of the evening I'm Sarajevo (taste me!) dressed as "the turnip of Europe". [I'm not making this up, you know...]

The winner of each show is entirely decided by the votes of the audience, apparently, and changes every night. Our winning act was the supposedly tongue-in cheek Polish entry, which was fab - and extremely gay (which says a lot for the audience!). Highly recommended - I'd go again!




Eurobeat - Almost Eurovision website

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