Britain enjoyed a full minute of optimum sunshine this morning before everyone started moaning about the heat.The Daily Mash
The moment happened when everyone was either commuting or already in work, giving nobody opportunity to actually savour it before being stuck inside for a long, sweaty day.
Marketing executive Tom Logan said: “Sunshine’s great in theory. But when it’s nippy getting into work then a slow-roasted hell by lunchtime, I have to question the point.
“It’s basically treason if you’re British and don’t spend every single available second outside when the temperature exceeds 20 degrees, but I’m sweating cobs and my sandwich tastes of suncream.
“It’ll be baking when I finish work. It’ll be stifling when I go to bed tonight. And tomorrow’s Saturday, so it’ll be raining.”
The only people able to enjoy the balmy minute were old men on their way to buy a newspaper and schoolchildren playing truant.
72-year-old Norman Steele said: “Ah, wonderful to be out here with the rays playing gently on the sun-dappled pavements.
“Oh, minute’s over. Now it’s too hot.”
There is, of course, a shorter message to anyone who dares to decry, discriminate, agitate or threaten violence against us. As is traditional on this day, we leave it to Lily Allen (and the GayClic Collab Against Homophobia) to say it.Queer freedom is an unstoppable global trend
The last few years have witnessed an unnerving backlash against lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex (LGBTI) people in nearly 20 countries, including Russia, Morocco, Uganda, Iraq, Brunei, Syria, Nigeria and The Gambia.
This escalating repression has included more vigorous enforcement of long-standing laws criminalising same-sex relations; resulting in highly publicised arrests in countries such as Tunisia, Cameroon, India, Egypt and Senegal.
Prohibitions on same-sex relations
Seventy-three countries still have a total prohibition on same-sex relations. Half of them are members of the Commonwealth. Their homophobic laws were imposed by Britain in the nineteenth century, during the era of colonialism, and retained after independence.
The penalties for homosexuality include 25 years jail in Trinidad and Tobago and 20 years plus flogging in Malaysia. Several Commonwealth countries stipulate life imprisonment: India, Sierra Leone, Tanzania, Pakistan, Uganda, Bangladesh and Guyana.
There have also been new laws enacted in some countries, most excessively in Nigeria, which has outlawed LGBTI organisations, fundraising and public advocacy – and even banned gay-focused HIV prevention and LGBT-themed books and movies.
Lesser repression involves restrictions on media coverage of LGBTI issues and on the foreign funding of LGBTI groups, as happens in Uganda.
In these backlash countries, LGBTI people are increasingly demonised and scapegoated by demagogic politicians and fundamentalist clerics as a cheap way to win popular support.
At the start of 2016, a spokesperson for Malawi’s opposition party, Ken Msonda, sought to bolster his profile and win bigoted votes: “Arresting them (LGBTIs) won’t address this problem because sooner or later they are being released on bail. The best way to deal with this problem is to kill them!”
Anglican churches in Nigeria and Uganda have contributed to the witch-hunting atmosphere; supporting draconian new anti-gay laws.
Distracting from economic failings and corruption
To the delight of many governments, having an “enemy within” has conveniently distracted public attention from economic failings and corruption.
Hate rhetoric is fuelling homophobic mob violence – sometimes perpetrated by right-wing death squads – especially in Honduras, Brazil, Mexico, Peru and El Salvador. Over 200 Honduran LGBTI activists have been assassinated since 2008.
A disproportionately high number of victims of anti-LGBTI violence are transgender people. The Trans Murder Monitoring project reports that over 1,300 trans and gender-diverse women and men were murdered in Latin America from 2008 to 2014.
In recent years, the Indian and Singaporean courts have upheld the criminalisation of same-sex relations, and Burundi and Chad have outlawed homosexuality for the first time in their history.
Islamic State in Syria is targeting LGBTIs for execution, mostly by throwing them off tall buildings. In neighbouring Iraq, Shia militias are also waging a terror campaign against LGBTI people.
Despite this bleak picture, in the overwhelming majority of the world’s 193 countries, the trend is towards ever greater LGBTI acceptance and equality.
Greater LGBTI legal protections
In recent years, we’ve seen the decriminalisation of gay sex in Belize, Palau, São Tomé and Príncipe, Northern Cyprus, Mozambique, Nauru and the Seychelles.
There are legal challenges to the ban on same-sex relations in Jamaica and Trinidad and Tobago.
A Ugandan court annulled the notorious Anti-Homosexuality Act, albeit on a technicality. The new Bill to replace it has never been legislated.
Vietnam lifted the ban on same-sex marriage in 2015, as a prelude to its expected eventual legalisation.
The Botswana courts have for the first time recognised the right of an LGBTI organisation to be registered and the Indian Supreme Court has upheld the rights of the trans community.
Helem, Lebanon’s LGBTI group, has operated for over a decade; hosting the first LGBTI centre in the Arab world. Taiwan has elected its first woman president, a supporter of same-sex marriage, in a country where marriage equality now has more than two-thirds public support.
The first openly lesbian cabinet Minister has taken office in South Africa, while two men who were prosecuted for being gay in Zambia were acquitted at their trial.
Both the United Nations Human Rights Council and the African Commission on Human and People’s Rights passed resolutions in 2014 calling on governments to protect their LGBTI communities against discrimination and hate crime.
What the global public thinks
Research by the Williams Institute has found rising global acceptance of same-sex relations, including in many developing countries:
“Latin American acceptance of homosexuality ranges from a high of 34% in Uruguay to a low of 2% in Ecuador. On legal recognition for marriages for same-sex couples, Uruguay has the highest level of support at 57% while Guatemala has the lowest level of support at 12%. In Africa, acceptance of homosexuality ranges from a high of 38% in South Africa to a low of 2% in Ghana.”
These figures of support are still too low but nonetheless a big improvement on a decade ago.
In this context of majority progress, backlash is a minority blip in the overall worldwide trajectory towards LGBTI equality. It is a reaction to the positive gains won by brave, determined LGBTI human rights defenders, many of whom risk their liberty and lives. If we were not winning there’d be no backlash. Backlash is a dreadful but backhanded compliment.
LGBTI freedom has been long delayed but it cannot be denied.
Labour's manifesto promises to reverse decades of free-market mismanagement and return Tom Baker to his rightful position as Doctor Who.The Daily Mash
The leaked manifesto claims the ‘Thatcherite’ Peter Davison era was a ‘betrayal of the working classes’, and that it, and all subsequent incarnations, would be declared invalid.
Jeremy Corbyn said: “There has only ever been one, true Doctor Who and we all know it.
“We will restore that Doctor, his jelly babies and his scarf, in adventures of four half-hour episodes where a man-in-a-suit monster is revealed only at the very end of the first.
“There will be regular battles with the Daleks and none of this modern focus on the ramifications of time travel.”
43-year-old Nathan Muir said: “I’ve been a free-market Tory all my voting life, but God help me, the man’s right.
“If he pledges to bring the cute Romana back as well it’s going to be a landslide.”
"Constitutionally I don't exist."And, as a well-wisher recently said “I’m sorry to hear you’re standing down,” Philip shot back: “Well I can’t stand up much longer."
"We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves."
"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife."
"Books are certainly old fashioned, but only people with a very limited perception are silly enough to condemn ideas because of their age. It is, of course, equally silly to condemn the new-fangled simply because it is strange, and I am full of admiration for the technologists who have developed all sorts of gadgets for the purpose of improving communications. However, I believe that all these fascinating machines are complementary to, and not substitutes for, books and the printed word."
“I’d like to go to Russia very much – although the bastards murdered half my family.”
"If that man had succeeded in abducting Anne, she would have given him a hell of a time while in captivity."
"It is an old cliche to say that the future is in the hands of the young."
"The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined."
"I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing."
"I declare this thing open, whatever it is."
