Saturday, 7 March 2009

The Sweet Life



Fifty years ago this month, a certain Swedish sexpot by the name of Anita Ekberg splashed around in the Trevi Fountain in Fellini's La Dolce Vita, and one of the iconic female screen images of the 20th century was born.

Read Duncan Kennedy's retrospective on the film.

And of course, "The Sweet Life" has inspired numerous musical tributes over the years. Here is my selection (in the genre we call "tacky", of course). Enjoy...

The utterly camp-as-tits After Dark (from the 2004 Melodifestivalen in Sweden):


Spanish singer Soraya Arnelas's take on the Ryan Paris song:


Finnish entry for Eurovision 1989, Anneli Saaristo:


And finally, Sparks!


Dolce, indeed.

Friday, 6 March 2009

It's but a pleasurable means to a measurable end



We went to see the Menier Chocolate Factory's new production of A Little Night Music last night - and what a show!

One of Stephen Sondheim's best works, the concept is relatively simple - a soap-opera plot revolving around generational differences, relationships and sex, all set to 4/4 waltz time. But in the hands of the master of all musicals (and a tremendous cast!) it becomes far more complicated as the lives of the characters unfold, and their various paths criss-cross. Based upon an Ingmar Bergman film, and set in the craziness of the Scandinavian eternal summer, it could hardly be straightforward...

Alexander Hanson is superb as the tormented Frederick, married for almost a year to Ann, a much younger wife who is "unfortunately still a virgin" despite his evident frustration at that fact. Events turn on their head when an old flame, the actress Desiree, comes to town. Brilliantly played by Hannah Waddingham (who was the "Lady of the Lake" in Spamalot), Desiree's reappearance after fourteen years, complete with teenage daughter, throws doubt into Frederick's life. Their duet You Must Meet My Wife is a skilful dissection of the foolishness of the marriage, at the hands of a much older, wiser woman.

Frederick and Desiree's rekindling relationship causes problems for everyone when one of her lovers, the Count (accurately played as a complete madman by Alistair Robins) becomes psychopathically jealous. He uses his long-suffering wife Charlotte (the wonderful Kelly Price) to stir things up by telling the naive Ann about their affair, and she pours her heart out about her own unhappiness in the fabulous number Every Day A Little Death.

Then it all gets really complicated as Desiree talks her mother Madame Armfeldt (played to bitter, imperious perfection by Maureen Lipman, who obviously relishes the part and delivers all the best lines in the show) into hosting a Weekend in the Country, where all the characters are uncomfortably thrown together. Delicious bitchiness ensues as everyone examines their own feelings about each other, and their relationships.



The most famous number of the whole show is of course Send in the Clowns, often treated as a torch song, but here magnificently delivered by Miss Waddingham as the desperate breakdown of a strong woman's defences in the face of a rapidly diminishing chance of happiness with her lost love. Utterly awe-inspiring - I could hardly breathe through her stunning performance.

Miss Lipman's Madame Armfeldt gets her own show-stopper too, of course, as she reminisces about the flimsiness of the sexual morés of the younger generation, compared to the profitable nature of her own affairs, with Liaisons - and she really does deliver it magnificently!

At the villa of the Baron De Signac,
Where I spent a somewhat infamous year,
At the villa of the Baron De Signac
I had ladies in attendance,
Fire-opal pendants...

Liaisons! What's happened to them?
Liaisons today.
Disgraceful! What's become of them?
Some of them
Hardly pay their shoddy way.

What once was a rare champagne
Is now just an amiable hock,
What once was a villa, at least,
Is "digs."
What once was a gown with train
Is now just a simple little frock,
What once was a sumptuous feast
Is figs.
No--not even figs--raisins!
Ah, liaisons!
Now, where was I? Where was I? Oh, yes...

At the palace of the Duke of Ferrara,
Who was prematurely deaf but a dear,
At the palace of the Duke of Ferrara
I acquired some position
Plus a tiny Titian...

Liaisons! What's happened to them?
Liaisons today.
To see them--indiscriminate
Women, it
Pains me more than I can say,
The lack of taste that they display!

Where is style?
Where is skill?
Where is forethought?
Where's discretion of the heart?
Where's passion in the art?
Where's craft?
With a smile
And a will
But with more thought,
I acquired a château
Extravagantly overstaffed.

Too many people muddle sex
With mere desire,
And when emotion intervenes
The nets descend.
It should on no account perplex,
Or worse, inspire;
It's but a pleasurable means
To a measurable end.
Why does no one comprehend?
Let us hope this lunacy's just a trend.
Now where was I? Where was I? Oh, yes...

In the castle of the King of the Belgians,
(We would visit through a false chiffonier)
In the castle of the King of the Belgians
Who, when things got rather touchy,
Deeded me a duchy...

Liaisons! What's happened to them?
Liaisons today.
Untidy! Take my daughter, I
Taught her, I
Tried my best to point the way.
I even named her Desiree.

In a world where the kings are employers,
Where the amateur prevails
And delicacy fails
To pay,
In a world where the princes are lawyers,
What can anyone expect
Except to recollect...

And while the bitterness of the lives of the guests is played out in full, the servants take the opportunity to enjoy themselves. The maid Petra (Kaisa Hammerlund) treats us to her own thoughts on life in the wonderfully bawdy The Miller’s Son, cocking a snook at the inflexibility of the upper classes, and her outlook on sex as a young woman cleverly mirrors yet contrasts the sentiments of the much older Mme Armfeldt:

It's a very short way
From the fling that's for fun
To the thigh pressing un-
Der the table.
It's a very short day
Till you're stuck with just one
Or it has to be done
On the sly.
In the meanwhile,
There are mouths to be kissed
Before mouths to be fed,
And there's many a tryst
And there's many a bed,
There's a lot I'll have missed
But I'll not have been dead
When I die!
And a person should celebrate everything
Passing by.

Many of the complex strands of these bizarre people's lives are drawn together in a denouement that leaves some wounds exposed, but resolves many more. Not a happy ending, nor entirely sad - just A Little Night Music.

We had a great time, and even got the chance to have a little drinkie in the Green Room bar with the whole cast, including Maureen Lipman, afterwards.

I highly recommend everyone to see this show! Although the entire run at the Menier Chocolate Factory sold out within weeks, the show transfers to the Garrick Theatre on 28th March.

No preview videos are available of the Menier cast yet, but here are a few songs from the show:





A Little Night Music at Menier Chocolate Factory

Thursday, 5 March 2009

Love Is Called My Old Piano

We have become Piano Bar aficionados!

Spending some time with the family (Madam Arcati's niece and nephew) in the West End last night, we stumbled across the late night piano bar at the New Players' Theatre under the arches opposite Heaven. We hadn't been there for years - but what a find!

Although last night's pianist limited his repertoire to interpretations of MOR music (Police, Elton, Marvin Hamlisch), the atmosphere was great, and we had a fab time. The place has a reputation for attracting thesps and players from all the West End shows, and true to form the place was heaving with bow-tie-wearing orchestra members and chorus boys'n'girls. On certain nights, some of them are tempted up to the piano to do their own songs, and I am certain we will be making this one of our regular haunts in future on the off-chance of catching a performance such as this...

Wednesday, 4 March 2009

A most versatile lady



Alas, another of the greats of British comedy has gone.

Joan Turner, an opera-trained singer, DJ and "off-the-wall" comedienne, began her long and tumultuous career with the Crazy Gang (a 1950s anarchic comedy troupe, a sort of combination of Music Hall and The Goons) and was soon taken to the hearts of British audiences. She headlined at a Royal Command Performance above The Beatles, and rapidly became the highest-earning female singer in the UK.

Fame was a double-edged sword for Joan, however, and despite her immense popularity here - with sell-out shows at The Talk Of The Town and her own TV and radio shows - she tried her hand at cracking the American market. This turned out to be a disaster, as her penchant for the good life, vodka and champagne and her terrible temper got the better of her.

She ended up at one point living as a bag lady in Las Vegas and Los Angeles, looking for that "one big break". She was rescued from that fate when the media caught up with her in the US, and she returned to Britain in 2001.

Despite her incredible list of famous friendships (she apparently had affairs with Peter Sellers and Tony Hancock), including Lynda La Plante, she never regained her fame and fortune. She even turned up drunk and fell off the stage at a dinner in her honour in 2003!

Her autobiography I Thought It Grew on Trees, is due to to be published in August this year, and I for one look forward to reading this lady's incredible story in her own words...

Here's a very small sample of the talents of Joan Turner:


Read Joan Turner's obituary in The Guardian

Tuesday, 3 March 2009

When you lose control and you got no soul

Good heavens! Can it really be thirty years since this was at Number One in the charts?


Here I lie
In a lost and lonely part of town
Held in time
In a world of tears I slowly drown
Goin' home
I just cant take it all alone
I really should be holding you
Holding you
Loving you loving you

Tragedy
When the feelings gone and you cant go on
Its tragedy
When the morning cries and you don't know why
Its hard to bear
With no-one to love you you're
Goin' nowhere
Tragedy
When you lose control and you got no soul
Its tragedy
When the morning cries and you don't know why
Its hard to bear
With no-one to love you you're
Goin' nowhere

Night and day
There's a burning down inside of me
Burning love
With a yearning that wont let me be
Down I go
And I just cant take it all alone
I really should be holding you
Holding you
Loving you loving you

Monday, 2 March 2009

Forever Dusty



I know it is usually Tacky Music Monday, but today is a special anniversary... It is ten years since the world lost that most incredible of singers Dusty Springfield.

Dusty had the most gorgeous singing voice - she had a rare quality that allowed her to tackle such different types of music as that of Bacharach & David, Holland-Dozier-Holland and Jacques Brel in one set, delivering each with a sublime grace that others could rarely match.

She championed the rise to prominence in the UK of Motown, and with her support dozens of black artists including Martha & the Vandellas, The Supremes, Aretha Franklin, Stevie Wonder and Marvin Gaye created a niche for their music in this country long before 60s America would even give them airplay.

Dusty's hidden lesbianism and drink dependency led to other problems that meant even after the massive success of her 60s albums, including one of the most lauded LPs of all time Dusty in Memphis, her career went into a bit of a decline throughout the 70s. With the able assistance of Pet Shop Boys she made a well-deserved comeback in the 1980s, and she was rightly recognised for her lifetime achievements with a series of awards.

Her death was met with huge fan hysteria, her funeral was attended by hundreds of people, the great and the good, and even the Queen said she was 'saddened' to learn that Dusty was dead (she had been due to go to the Palace to receive her OBE on the day she died). I was living in Plymouth at the time, and we all wore black armbands.

Here are just three of my all-time favourite Dusty tracks:




Dusty Springfield, OBE (born Mary Isobel Catherine Bernadette O'Brien, 16th April 1939 – 2nd March 1999)

Sunday, 1 March 2009

Doing the Lambeth Walk, Oi!

We had a great time at the Modern Music Hall event at the Drill Hall last night!

Organised by the Camden LGBT Forum as a free closing gala for Gay History Month, I was lucky to get tickets before the event was featured in the gay press - which was a good thing as the place was packed!



Our master of ceremonies was the fabulous Luke Meredith, trying his best to give the whole thing an authentic Music Hall feel - although I don't remember Leonard Sachs wearing fishnets and a leather thong on The Good Old Days!



Mr Meredith is superb - not only keeping the evening's entertainment together, but also treating us to a selection of his own songs (including a love song to a Dalek!), and getting the audience to take part in a good old fashioned sing-a-long.

One moody member of the audience complained about the inclusion of The Lambeth Walk "'cos we're North London, innit?" - but I rather think she may have been at the wrong event. And when Mr Meredith cleverly updated the genre with a sing-a-long of Can't Get You Out Of My Head and Parklife I think even the most hardened cynics joined in...

Surprise hit of the night was the very obscure Sjaak van der Bent, who describes himself as an "opera singer extraordinaire, self confessed failed heterosexual". He arrived on stage with a handbag and a fetching frock, and held the audience in raptures with his beautiful voice and off-the-wall repartee.

The (very attractive) Snakeboy treated us to a few bellydance numbers, and there was (unfortunately) some mime - least said soonest mended.



After the break, as well as more mime (someone should tell Divo and Sofia that middle aged women pretending to be black boys wasn't even funny when French & Saunders did it), we were entertained by the most authentic of music hall acts Hilda Eusebio aka "Jack the Drag King in Evolution", and of course our very own budding superstar of the queer cabaret circuit Michael Twaits was absolutely brilliant as always...



All this, and a free buffet afterwards! A really well thought out and impressive evening, in the true spirit of Variety - congratulations to Ingo and the whole Wotever World crew for putting it together, and it is great to see that The Drill Hall is still in business after the Arts Council cut its funding last year...

...and to give a taste of the evening, here's Mr Van der Bent him(her)self: