Monday, 22 December 2014

Ding-a-ling



Continuing our countdown till the dreaded Xmas - but looking forward to the fact that there are only three more days before the office closes for a whole week - to cheer ourselves up, we should sit back on this Tacky Music Monday and watch as Liza Minnelli goes completely bonkers - Ding-a-ling, indeed:



Of course, young Liza is playing "Snow White" to Cyril Ritchard's drag queen "Big Bad Wolf", and probably doesn't know she's about to be eaten...

Oh, it's all far too jolly for me.

Bah Humbug! And pass the Pall Mall.

Sunday, 21 December 2014

The darkest of them all


We're unlikely to see him in Benalmadena, more's the pity

It's Midwinter's Day. The darkest of them all.

However, the good news is - from tomorrow the days start getting longer again!

At Dolores Delargo Towers, our thoughts are not on the cold nor the dark, on "festivities" nor present-giving. No! Our annual holiday to Spain is booked for the first week of February, so all our thoughts are on "escape"...

Here to remind us what warmth and sunshine are like is another marvellous smooth classic ("She '73"), courtesy of Soft Tempo Lounge:



[Music: Soledad by Alfonso Santisteban]

Ah, that's better!

Make it spin



It's worth remembering that this Festering Season is not just one Middle Eastern cult's baby-worship celebration, it's also another Middle Eastern cult's season for spinning weird toys.

From South Park, here's the fabulously odd Broflofski family with Cartman and Stan to explain the whole business in their own inimitable fashion - Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel:



Oh, and just because I love you, here's a semi-naked man swinging round a stripper pole playing The Dreidel song on a clarinet:



And why not?

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Our kind of scheduling



Time for a bit of classic cinema, methinks.

I haven't checked the TV schedules over the Festering Season, as I fear I will be sorely disappointed - with the combined resources of the BBC, ITV, Channels 4 and 5, Sky and more cable channels than you can shake a stick at, what's the betting that whenever we switch the telly on, there'll be a murder, wedding, shocking revelation or tragic accident in all the soaps, repeats of Only Fools and Horses, makeover shows, festive parties with non-entities from The Only Way is Essex, or a Christmas special of Freaky Eaters - and I very much doubt there'll be much room for "our kind of movie"...

So let's allow the effervescent Steve Hayes, the "Tired Old Queen at the Movies", to show us a little of what we'll be missing - as he features Holiday with Katherine Hepburn, Cary Grant and Lew Ayres!



Nostalgic, moi?

Bonga, Bonga, Bonga



It is that time of year when all bets are off as to what rubbish will top the UK charts for the Festering Season. Undoubtedly it will be some codswallop by a warbler who won X-Factor or similar (who, by this time next year, will no doubt be appearing on Splash! or Celebrity Super Spa or another grotesque "reality TV" concoction).

However, it is also the season for newspapers to dig out some of the worst seasonal pop pap ever released, and, in the true spirit of Xmas, I thought I'd share a slew of absolute corkers.

How about The Cheeky Girls and Andy Newton-Lee [whoooo?] - Xmas-time Love?



Then there's Miss Cyndi Lauper's worst ever moment - her Christmas Conga:



And finally, if anyone ever thought the New Kids on the Block were "cool", surely that must have been dispelled by their Funky, Funky Christmas!



It'll all be over soon.

Friday, 19 December 2014

One slow descent into respectability









RIP Mandy Rice-Davies, tabloid-headline-setting dolly bird of the 60s and one of the tarts at the heart of the Profumo Affair that brought down Prime Minister Harold MacMillan and rocked his government, who has died aged 70.

Her notoriety (and that of fellow "model" Christine Keeler) lasted long after the names of many of the other "players" in the scandal had faded - with a leading role alongside David Bowie, Patsy Kensit and Ray Davies in Absolute Beginners, and - of course - a cameo in AbFab. She famously described her life as "one slow descent into respectability." But who knew she sang (after a fashion)?!

From her EP Introducing Mandy, hurriedly-released in 1964 after the trial, here is her version of the classic Close your Eyes:



Marilyn (Mandy) Rice Davis (21st October 1944 – 18th December 2014)

Feliz?



It's the last weekend before the Festering Season festivities really kick in.

The last-minute scramble for shit gifts, the last desperate office parties; the time that fam-i-lees clog the supermarket aisles with trolleys full of enough food and booze to feed the whole of a small African nation.

And never forget, Boney M are not just for Xmas, they're for life!

Feliz Navidad:


Thank Disco It's Friday! Roll on New Year.