Tuesday, 19 June 2018

An open invitation

Men who insist on dressing provocatively by wearing kilts are basically inviting people to stick cameras up them, it has been claimed.

Upskirting fan Francesca Johnson said: “If they want to parade around in public wearing next to nothing, then it’s an open invitation for a pervert like me to shove my smartphone up there.

“I’ve going to a wedding in Scotland this weekend so it’ll be wall-to-wall kilts. They don’t have to wear them, they could dress modestly, but if they’re choosing kilts, they’re choosing the extra attention.

“Don’t play the ‘it’s my family tartan’ card when we all know you’re just a burly 46-year-old little minx.”

She added: “I suppose I could choose not be a predatory sex pest, but it’s easier for me to blame them instead of examining my own sinister creepiness. Plus me and my mates have got a bet on who can get the most photos of actual knobs.”

Kilt wearer Tom Logan said: “Is she really going to get some sort of sexual thrill from looking at a very bad quality picture of my pants? She needs to get a fucking life.”
The Daily Mash

Of course.

Any excuse, really, for some gratuitous "up-kilt" shots...

The "real" story.


  1. I always thought the caber had to be more vertical before being tossed.

  2. I wore a kilt once, years ago. My roommate and I went out to one of the clubs in the city where I lived at the time. Used to have a huge Sunday gay crowd...campy good fun. We decided to wear kilts out one night. He and I, and the one bartender, would always ended up on top of the bar dancing each week. That night we had got so drunk, and forget we didn't wear unders...we were grinding on each other and pulling them up .....the crowd got an eyeful of swinging fruit that night.

    How we ever made it to work on Mondays was beyond me. And talk about saving money. We got free drinks.

    1. Bet you got more than just the drinks for free, dear!

      I remember one particular Gay Pride back in the 90s, when we still had a party in a park to follow the march. Kilts were very popular that year for some reason, and when I ventured into an "interesting shrubbery area" behind the park's toilet block it was reminiscent of a Victorian photographers' convention with the number of heads under cloth... Jx

  3. @maddie - swing that low-hanging fruit, you naughty gurl!

    1. Twirling it like a helicopter, I bet. Jx

  4. Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low
    Through the streets in my kilt I'll go
    All the lassies say hello
    Donald where's your trousers

    1. Well I caught a cold and me nose was raw
      I had no handkerchief at all
      So I hiked up my kilt and I gave it a blow,
      Now you can't do that with troosers!



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