Monday, 16 April 2018

"He was a lunatic"

  • “I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.”
  • “And God said, ‘Let there be light’, and there was light, but the electricity board said he would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.”
  • “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.”
  • “Money couldn’t buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.”
  • "It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't."
  • “Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.”
  • “I’m a hero with coward’s legs.”
  • "My father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic."
  • “All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.”
  • “The best cure for sea sickness is to sit under a tree.”
  • “How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.”
  • “I turned and rubbed my hands with glee. I always keep a tin of glee handy.”
  • “I can speak Esperanto like a native.”
  • “Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.”
We have another centenary to celebrate, dear reader - the much-missed comedic genius that was Spike Milligan was born one hundred years ago today!

From the moment he arrived on BBC Home Service radio after the war, in the madcap company of Peter Sellers, Harry Secombe and Michael Bentine in The Goon Show, British audiences took to Spike's weird brand of humour with a vengeance. It is true to say that without him/them, such classic examples of the truly bizarre as Monty Python's Flying Circus and the The Goodies, and off-beat talents such as Marty Feldman, Kenny Everett, Peter Cook and Dudley Moore, would - and probably could - never have had the success they did.

Long after Sellers hit the big time, Bentine went to children's telly and Secombe became more well-known as a singer than a comic, Spike continued to create mayhem with his "Q" series, and zillions of cameos in everything from the Two Ronnies to Life of Brian to Gormenghast.

He's the man who - after sitting through a panegyric of praise from His Royal Highness at an award ceremony - called Prince Charles "a grovelling bastard" [thankfully, in real life, the two are great friends]. Irreverent to the last, his headstone reads "Told you I was ill!".

On this Tacky Music Monday, here (again) is my favourite number of his...

Terence Alan "Spike" Milligan KBE (16th April 1918 – 27th February 2002)


  1. Darling Spike. He told me this verse:
    There was a little fly
    That flew into a store
    He prfft on the ceiling
    And he prfft on the floor
    He prrfft on the bacon and he prrfft on the ham
    And he prrfft on the head of the little grocer man.
    The grocer man he swore and he got his flitting gun
    he swore to get that fly before the day was done
    but before he could count from 1 up to 10
    That little fly prrfft on the grocer man again.

    1. I loved his poems! My fave is:

      I must go down to the sea again
      To the lonely sea and the sky
      I left my vest and socks there
      I wonder if they're dry?


  2. Difficult to live with I am sure but for for us pure joy.


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