It ain't no sin

Not so much "another piece of my childhood" as a formative influence on my entire gay life - the pioneering gay porn film director and producer William Higgins, founder of the legendary Catalina Video label and the man behind such well-loved titles as The Young & The Hung, The Pizza Boy: He Delivers, Big Guns and Route 69, has died.

His - ahem - classic output was a mainstay of my under-the-bed VHS collection, and he made "household names" [in certain households, anyhow] of a cavalcade of perfectly proportioned - ahem - actors such as Kip Noll, Chad Johnson, Rick Donovan, Christopher Lance, Kevin Wiles, Chad Douglas, Cory Monroe, Mike Henson, Jeff Stryker and (my fave) Kevin Williams, among many more "shags-that-never-were".

RIP William Higgins, aka "Wim Hof" (19th December, 1942 - 20th December 2019)

Another of my fabled convoluted connections exists between this sad news and the continuing Festering Season countdown. By complete coincidence I had already scheduled another "throwback" rediscovery from my continuing trawl through the annals [oo-er!] of this blog (repairing broken links as I go) - and it's a perfect fit. From December 2013... this!

...to make our "festering season" really special, it seems appropriate to dispense with this religious claptrap and offend as many people as possible.

But it seems Kenny and Mr Hankey from South Park have beaten us to it!

Mr Hankey and Kenny from South Park sing the most offensive song ever

And just in case anyone failed to understand the eloquent Kenny...

Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho!
The Virgin Mary was sleeping when Angel Gabriel appeared,
He said, "You are to be the virgin mother"
And Mary thought that was weird.

Kenny: Mary said "I'm not a virgin, I blew a guy last year"

Mr. Hankey: But then Gabriel said to Mary,
"My child, have no fear."

Kenny: 'Cause you can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: And still not be considered flawed.

Kenny: Although you went to town, and sucked some semen down,

Together: You're still a virgin in the eyes of God.

Mr. Hankey: There was no room at the inn
When Mary and Joseph did arrive
They were so very tired you see

Kenny: and Mary had to offer a bribe,

Mr. Hankey: Since she had no money

Kenny: How would she pay for a place to sleep?

Mr. Hankey: Gabriel appeared to Mary and told her not to weep

Kenny: 'Cause, you can suck all the dick you want...
And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: And still be the mother of Christ.

Together: If there's no room at the inn
Then it's not considered a sin

Kenny: To suck some dick to get a room for the night!

Mr. Hankey: That's right!
And three wise men did appear
Bearing gifts of myrrh and such
They said that they had followed a star
And missed a woman's touch

Kenny: Mary thought she might pleasure them, but could not take them to bed,

Mr. Hankey: But again Gabriel appeared to her and this is what he said

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: Every one in the nation.

Kenny: Fellatio ain't no sin
She gonna blow those three wise men,

Mr. Hankey: And you'll still be a virgin

Kenny: 'Cause there was no penetration

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: That donkey, and the ox and the lamb...

Mr. Hankey: And even the little drummer boy.
Folks will remember your name quick.

Kenny: They'll say "Damn! that bitch could suck a good dick!"

Together: Cause sucking dick brings peace on Earth and joy!

Kenny: Cause sucking dick...

Mr. Hankey: ..brings peace on Earth and joy!

Kenny: Mary, Mary suck that dick!

So seasonal.