The guy sure looks like plant food to me!

Oh. My. Heavens!

Madam Arcati, Russ, Joe and I had the most magnificent evening yesterday, as we processed through a blustery Regent's Park to the Open Air Theatre to see the new production (by Maria Aberg) of an old fave, Little Shop of Horrors [by Alan Menken and writer Howard Ashman, later to become Disney music stalwarts].

It has, of course, been something we wanted to see ever since the reviews started coming in - not least that by Alun Hood on WhatsOnStage (a site normally more restrained in its effusiveness), who said:

"This is a hell of a show. Fans of the original won't be disappointed and people encountering it for the first time will be delighted, and likely to come back for more. I would give it six stars if I could. Do not miss it. Joyous."

Mr Hood was entirely accurate.

From the outset, the grey, sleazy decrepitude of Skid Row and its anonymous shadowy tramps [and moving skyscrapers-on-shopping-trolleys - a very clever set], clashing wildly with the vivid green outfits and brash "doo-woppery" of the "chorus" (Renee Lamb, Christina Modestou and Seyi Omooba), created an atmosphere where one could quite imagine anything - even a ravenous, bloodthirsty, domineering pot-plant-from-hell (well, "Outer Space", anyhow) - would have come as a blessed relief from the tedium of their lives. [An admirably created atmosphere, incidentally, given the leafy and serene real-life environs of the Open Air Theatre.]



And come, of course, it certainly does. But first, the scenarios are set: Seymour the orphan (Marc Antolin), who was taken in by the florist Mr Mushkin (an unrecognisable Forbes Masson from The High Life), develops a fascination for unusual plants. Then there's a total eclipse, and... a weird little luminescent pot plant becomes the star attraction, if only Seymour can find a way to keep it alive (quoth Please Grow For Me - "Whaddya want from me? Blood?!").



Meanwhile we are introduced to Audrey (Jemima Rooper), Seymour's fellow assistant at "Mushkin's" and secret love interest, who has a bullying and violent boyfriend Orin (boy-band Busted's bassist Matt Willis) with the perfect vocation for a sadist (Be a Dentist), and the plot thickens.



Audrey has dreams to escape the sordidness of both her rundown urban existence and the bully in her life - and Miss Rooper's Somewhere That's Green really was impassioned; so much that the hairs stood up on my neck. Seymour has become famous, and has realised exactly what the alien plant (now christened "Audrey 2") really wants - his blood. So much has it enjoyed the regular drips, indeed, that it has not only outgrown its little pot, but it has evolved - into a drag queen of substantial proportions!



Miss Vicky Vox (for it is she, of Boy is a Bottom notoriety) is utterly stunning in this role (normally reserved for an elaborate animatronic puppet). She literally dominates proceedings - often with little more than a strut, an arch of an eyebrow, or a suggestively-placed microphone - from here on in. And when she cajoles Seymour to Feed Me (Git It) (both have just witnessed Orin's brutality towards Audrey, so it is obvious what the scheme is), it's down to our weedy "hero" to tackle the brute. Needless to say, Mr Willis's maniacally-played villain (choking on his own laughing-gas, he cackles himself to death) soon becomes plant food, and the spiral of Seymour's destiny is set...

After the indignity of having to go out of the [OUTDOOR!] venue into the road in order to have a ciggy [and a gossip with our chums Bryanne and Simon, who were also enjoying the show - we also bumped into them at at Proms in the Park; bloody stalkers...], it was time to grab a drink and head back for Act 2.



Seymour's fame, and the success of the flower shop, have rocketed. Mr Willis returns in a variety of camp-as-tits cameos, as various disreputable touts trying to tie the "horticultural superstar" into book and TV contracts. But Seymour would rather spend his life with Audrey (the original), and she admits she wants that too (Suddenly, Seymour - superbly done, incidentally). Then Mr Mushnik drops a bombshell - he knows that Seymour is responsible for the death of the dentist and intends to tell the police of his suspicions. Oh, dear. For the ravenous Audrey 2 - it's Suppertime!

Unfortunately, this means the plant now has the upper hand [leaf? shoot?] - and indeed, when Seymour declares that Audrey 2 must die, it is his Audrey that pays the ultimate price. Wandering into the beast's domain after hours, she is tricked into watering the monster - and despite Seymour's efforts, she, too is consumed. His attempts to see off his nemesis (with a gun, rat poison and a machete) are to no avail, and...



...well, the finale-to-beat all-finales ensued! With Audrey 2 poised to take over the world, she spews forth her "babies" - in the animated forms of the entire cast (the digested Seymour included), all attired in the most outrageously camp tendril-based outfits ever seen! All singing the dire warning Don't Feed The Plants, they invaded the audience, accompanied by giant green balloons for us to bat around - before Audrey 2 herself, surrounded by inflatable tendrils, belted out her climactic final number. What else but The Mean Green Mother from Outer Space?! She wins.

This was a fantastic evening of brilliant showmanship - we were utterly blown away by it.

I have absolutely no idea how (or if) it would ever work in another venue (a stage environment like the Open Air Theatre would be hard to replicate), but it really deserves to be recognised as the most utterly spectacular show we've seen in years...

Little Shop of Horrors runs at the Regents Park Open Air Theatre until Saturday 22nd September.