Almost there, folks. Almost there...
As another much-needed weekend of fun and frolics hoves into view [and we have another theatre trip to look forward to tomorrow - Jerry's Girls at the Menier Chocolate Factory], we need to get this party started!
Here's a little "blast from the past" - from thirty-three years ago, when House Music ruled the world...
Thank Disco It's Friday!
Have a great one, dear reader...
PS Yes, I have featured it before - as a recipe!
Very many happy returns to the fantabulosa and multi-talented Harvey Fierstein, who blows out 70 candles on his cake today!
A creative genius of a man - among his triumphs, he wrote and directed (and starred in) the original Torch Song Trilogy on stage and the film adaptation, wrote the book and lyrics for Jerry Herman's La Cage Aux Folles, and the book for Cindi Lauper's triumphal Kinky Boots. On stage, he was the original "Edna Turnblad" in Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman's musical Hairspray, "Tevye" in Fiddler On The Roof, and replaced Douglas Hodge as "Albin/Zaza" in La Cage. On screen, he was in Mrs Doubtfire and Independence Day, episodes of Cheers and Murder She Wrote, and has done numerous voiceovers for the likes of The Simpsons and Mulan. Phew!
Needless to say, we adore him.
Here are a few highlights of the man's talents, starting with one of the best monologues of 'em all...
And finally, as Gay Pride is just around the corner, this:
Harvey Forbes Fierstein (born 6th June 1954)
I'm on a "study day" for work today.
Believe me, the subjects I'm studying are not nearly as interesting as hers...
Abandoned all hope of getting a shag? Fill your time with one of these cripplingly dull hobbies where your lack of sexual charisma will see you fit right in.Birdwatching
The closest you’ll get to anything you’d describe as a ‘bird’, and deservedly so if you enjoy talking about women like you’ve stepped out of Carry On Up The Khyber. All that money you’re not spending on romantic meals out and sex toys can be used to buy a posh pair of binoculars and if you’re really lucky you might get to spot some avian mating. You pervert.Bus-spotting
Even lower down the food chain of tragic male hobbies than trainspotters, bus-spotters spend their time tracking buses across their working service lives through various companies. At least trains retain some of the old fashioned glamour of the golden age of travel. Knowing the fleet number history of a particular Scania OmniTown is not going to get anyone hot for you. And if it does, you must marry her immediately.Warhammer
Pretending you’re a mystical overlord of destruction using little plastic figurines which you should have grown out of by the time you were 10 is the perfect pastime for sexually inadequate failures. Luckily, the people hanging out with you in the Warhammer shop are like-minded male geeks, so there are no scary females around to intimidate you. It’s a safe space, and discussing the intricacies of the Helican Subsector is much easier than asking a woman if she’d like to go out for a drink with you.WW2 re-enactment society
You’ve no future to look forward to, at least not in terms of a fulfilling relationship, so why not hark back to the halcyon days of Hitler, ration books and conscription? Women tend not to be so interested in running around a muddy field recreating the Second Battle of the Odon, so you’ve no worries about being distracted from your manoeuvres. And if they are around, they’ll be after the blokes confident and attractive enough to dress up as American GI’s, which will only add to the authenticity of your war experience.Internet forums
This is a self-fulfilling prophecy in terms of not getting a shag, as the more hours you plough in online, the more likely you are to meet fellow incels who convince you the reason you haven’t had sex for three years is because women are evil and not because you spend all your time on a cryptocurrency forum. Take a break and touch grass, as you no doubt tell other terminally online saddos to do several times a day.Watching cricket
Leave going to football matches to proper men with wives and girlfriends and immerse yourself in a sport so fucking tedious that half the players could lie down for a kip mid-contest and nobody would notice. It lasts all day, which means you at least get out of the house for a bit, and there is little worry of the woman sitting next to you giving you a spontaneous hug at a moment of high drama or excitement. Because there aren’t any.
Of course.
Here we go again...
After the cold and dank of Saturday, with only yesterday being nice enough to enjoy getting outdoors, I feel robbed of a proper weekend! Sigh.
Let's bring out the big guns this Tacky Music Monday to provide our much-needed wake-up call, shall we?
Our Patron Saint of Grrrowling (and Questionable History) Miss Amanda Lear fits the bill nicely:
Have a good week, dear reader.
Finally! The weather brightened up - it was vile yesterday and on Friday - so, needless to say, I've spent a fruitful several hours in the extensive gardens here at Dolores Delargo Towers, potting-on some little plants that have outgrown their pots, disposing of the Spring tulips (we don't have the space to keep anything that's not going to flower for a second year, and tulips in pots generally don't), and watering every single one of the remaining 200+ pots, troughs and wall-pots. Phew.
Time, methinks, for some "Sunday Music", courtesy of our "house band" again:
Faboo!
The BBC Asian Network has announced the winner of of its poll of the Ultimate 90s Bollywood Song, and it would be curmudgeonly of me not to feature it. We are great Bollywood music fans, after all.
From the 1995 romantic comedy Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge, starring Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol [dubbed, of course, by proper playback singers], here's Tujhe Dekha To (When I saw you):
I much prefer this one, to be honest - but then again, it is rather earlier than the 1990s...
Sharmila Tagore, sung by Sharda - Leja leja leja mera dil [from An Evening in Paris, 1967]Lamb Bhuna with pilau rice and a naan bread, anyone?
