Another fantabulosa time was had by all on Saturday, as the clans gathered from all over and descended on Dolores Delargo Towers for our Grand Eurovision party!
As usual, everyone pulled out all the stops on their costumes [everyone gets nominated a country for dressing-up/flag-waving, one for food and a third for booze]!
Of course, once the televisual feast began in earnest, all mayhem broke loose as usual - as we scored each of the twenty-five participating countries. Much shouting, jeering and cheering - especially for plucky little Olly!
There was some really weird stuff on offer - none more so than Ireland's Bambie Thug [a personal fave]!
There was also the usual profusion of gimmicky sets, unusual instruments, pyrotechnics, strobes, smoke machines, outlandish costumes and gyrating semi-naked male dancers (hurrah!). It wouldn't be Eurovision if you weren't completely boggled by it all...
Having tallied up all the booze-stained scoresheets, our gang's Top Five were as follows:
1. United Kingdom: Olly Alexander - Dizzy [...and we thought boxing was a butch sport?!]
2. Finland: Windows95man - No Rules! [or should that be "no pants"?]
3. Spain: Nebulossa - ZORRA [let's hear it for the boys!]
4. Switzerland: Nemo - The Code [how the hell did Nemo not fall off that spinning thing?]
5. Croatia: Baby Lasagna - Rim Tim Tagi Dim [possibly the "most Eurovision" song title of the lot!]
Inevitably, our choices were somewhat at odds with both the jury and the public votes...
But first - the interval acts! Our hosts Malin Åkerman and Petra Mede teased us with a performance from a Swedish super pop group “beginning with an A”... It wasn't that one, it was Alcazar!
Of course, there had to be some Abba - their "Abba-tars" from the Abba: Voyage show made a special appearance in place of the "real thing"...
...and there was a faboo Abba tribute, by previous contest-winners Carola, Charlotte Perrelli and Conchita Wurst:
All that done and dusted, it was time for the tortuous bit - first off, the votes from all 37 juries. Once these started to roll in, we began to realise that unlike in this country, Olly's song was not that popular across the rest of Europe. Or is it the inevitable political voting - "anyone but the UK"? In any case, we only got 46 votes! Forty-bloody-six.
The jury favourites were:
Switzerland - 365
France - 218
Croatia - 210
Italy - 164
Ukraine - 146
At least we had Dame Joanna Lumley to cheer us up:
To add insult to injury, then came the even more turgid business of announcing the public phone-in votes, and...
...the UK got nothing! Nil points. Nada. From any fucker in the world.
Talk about feeling rejected. The screams of outrage from our living-room could probably have reached Malmo!
In contrast, that scrawny little bitch from Switzerland ended up with a massive 591 combined points and won the Eurovision Song Contest, despite the fact that Croatia, Israel, Ukraine and France were all more popular with the public.
Deep sigh.
The party was fantabulosa! Sir Tel approved
Never mind, eh? - same time, same place next year?
Of course!!!
FOOTNOTE: Apologies for the blank pink placeholders for every video; this is because my US chums tend not to be able to view the official Eurovision Song Contest videos, so I have downloaded and upoloaded all of them direct to Blogger. See how good I am to you, dear reader?
PS:
I haven't forgotten it's a Tacky Music Monday just because I'm on holiday!
It's a Eurovision blog post.
How much more fucking tacky do you want?!
How Tacky indeed. I disagreed with the votes as always but this year "the UK got nothing! Nil points. Nada. From any fucker in the world." That's bonkers and undeserved.
ReplyDeleteFab party though as always and to be honest that is the point of Eurovision.
We always have such a fun time at "The Gay World Cup" - one of the highlights of the "Social Calendar", points or no points! Jx
DeleteWhat a great group of friends. What a joy!
ReplyDeleteOur gang is simply faboo, and certainly knows how to party! Jx
DeleteThe lady clutching her lametta, is she representing Norway? I didn't like the gleeful look the cunty presenter gave when she announced nul points and if I had been Olly I would have given all of Europe the wanker gesture.
ReplyDeleteHear, hear.
DeleteSx
Mitzi: "the lady with the lametta" and the Windows 95 t-shirt ain't no lady, that's my sister 🤣. She was Finland - and you need to see the act in order to know why the outfit is so odd (the lametta was supposed to represent fireworks)!
DeleteBoth: How Olly maintained a straight face and didn't run across the room and start tearing anyone's hair out is beyond me. Jx
I don't "go for" mod choons. But I do love a jolly fiesta and damn! Here's My vote (and, yes, it does count as I'm 50% ENGLISH!!) Enggg-a land! 50 points for a bloody good booze-up an' nosh!
ReplyDeleteOur late friend Alistair used to visibly shudder at the mention of Eurovision. Needless to say, he never came to one of our parties. His loss! Jx
DeletePS Olly was brought up in the Wye Valley, and went to school in Monmouth, Wales - so we Welsh lay a claim to him, too!
Fab Party indeed!! @Clutter From The Gutter - if you watch the entry from Finland, you'll see you're lucky I'm wearing pants! ;-). Same time next year :-)
ReplyDeleteWe were all very lucky in that regard.
DeleteIt was a fab party! Still coming down off the adrenaline, and we're off to Spain tomorrow! Jx
I had seen some of these on my own, and some others that were posted. I have to say Spain was one of my favorites.
ReplyDeleteQuite how your comment was trapped in the "Blogger junk email filter limbo" for so long is a mystery, Maddie, but it is good to know that you can (after all) manage to see some (if not all) the Eurovision videos - despite the usual "not available in your country" shit YouTube constantly throws our way.
DeleteI have had "Zorra, Zorra, Zorra" going through my head for weeks now - especially all the time we were actually in Spain! The voting was insane this year. Nebulossa only got 30 votes in total (jury and public votes combined) - even less than the UK... Jx